The Collinsport Chronicles IV: Memory
by Maryland Rose
Summary: What happened in 1967 between Barnabas and Maggie has been buried. But memories buried cannot be confronted and resolved. Now they threten to resurface again, and destroy them both.
1. Chapter 1

Phillip has been cleared of murder. Nicholas is back, ready to make trouble. Derek has disapperaed, or has he? Barnbas lost control when he found out that David and Amy had been dealing drugs, and attacked Amy, only to be injured by Chris. He is now recovering from his broken collarbone. David is locked up, as a dangerous drug addicted werewolf... And so it begins...

MEMORY

Chapter 1

Willie drove Barnabas to his office, not so much Barnabas needed transportation as because he needed moral support to face the backlog at his office.

"So you think that Carolyn will commit Roger?" Barnabas asked Willie.

"It is a good bet she will." Willie shrugged.

"I was afraid that it would happen."

"It is best this way, and you know it. Roger and guns...that's a nasty combination. If left untreated, he'll kill someone and that will mean an institution for the criminally insane."

"I know...I know..." Barnabas was evidently unhappy with the solution. "What about Phillip? He's free now, isn't he?"

"Got a lecture delivered to him on the evils of associating with nuts and con-men. But except that, the law has nothing on him."

"Good. What about Derek? Got any idea where he might be?"

"Nobody does. George thinks that with luck, he'll get himself killed in somebody else's district."

"He saved Phillip's life, in the end. It seems somewhat strange."

"On the contrary. Perfectly in character. What is strange in him was giving Roger a gun. He's scared of guns to start with. In his opinion the best way to ruin a simple caper is to get a gun in it. Because with a gun you get a trigger-happy nut, and before you know it, a corpse on your hands."

"He seems to have talked to you a lot."

"Yes. We had plenty of time to talk. He's quite a jailhouse lawyer. The best one I ever found. Thanks to him I got an early parole."

"You were in jail with him?" There was a hint of strangeness in Barnabas' voice.

"Of course" He noticed Barnabas tensing up and added "don't tell me you've forgotten I am an ex-con."

"Yes...of course..." Barnabas' eyes acquired a faraway look "You must have told me...in 67, wasn't it? I wish I could remember."

"It doesn't matter." Willie cursed himself for getting Barnabas thinking about 1967. "Anyway, I think that you are going at it wrong with Derek. You think of him in terms of yourself, and of course, that way he does not make sense. How would you like to have your kneecaps broken?"

"My kneecaps broken? Why?"

"See? You think that I am being quaint. But that's a serious question, and a very likely possibility. There are many places where that happens often. And that's where Pearce comes from. He's had to survive there, and learned a number of reflexes. He's not going to abandon them as long as they keep working."

They had reached the building. Barnabas braced himself for what was coming. The pile on his desk would still be there, just as he had left it. If he was lucky.

All that he had gotten from his explosion was an aching shoulder and the knowledge that he had made a fool of himself with Amy.

"Willie, you know something? Those papers in my desk...they are alive. They reproduce.

"What you mean?: Little boy papers and little girl papers?"

"No. I think that it is asexual. Like amoebas."

"Hey!" Frank's voice came from inside the office. "you might be right, you know."

"What are you doing here?" Barnabas stared at Frank, surprised.

"Giving you a hand. And for the looks of it, you need it."

"It is not so bad, really...I manage." Barnabas was defensive "It is just that I have been away."

Frank shook his head. "Don't try to con a veteran. You are badly in need of a survival course."

* * *

The lights shone in the big ballroom as she danced. Her long white gown brushed the floor with a slight rustling every time she moved.

"Let's stop." she begged the man dancing with her. "I am tired."

The man said nothing and moved faster. The lights brightened, blinding her. Her gown constricted her, making it difficult to breathe.

"Please.." she said.

"Don't you like dancing, Josette?" Barnabas asked.

The bodice of her gown contracted, crushing her ribs. She screamed as Barnabas dragged her across the ballroom floor...

Maggie woke screaming.

* * *

"Will I ever be able to leave this place?" Phillip asked, annoyed.

"Is it my fault that you decide to run cross country in the middle of the winter?" Delia Harding was a little testy that day. "You'll be out of here when the doctor says you can go, not before."

"I'm sorry about that."

"Trying to get out of paying your hospital bill. weren't you?"

"It wasn't that...I believed what Roger told me."

"What Roger Collins told you? What the town nut told you, that you believed? You know that he's being committed?"

"He is?"

"Of course. Mrs. Hawkes didn't want to, but the sheriff convinced her. She's making the arrangements now."

"What about the other one... Pearce?"

"Him?" there was a slight hesitancy in her voice that Phillip missed "He's disappeared. Say, you want to see your wife or not?"

"I...I am not sure."

"She could refuse to pay your hospital bill if you don't see her."

* * *

"Yes, Iris." Willie tried to conceal his nerves "What can I do for you? Need a new TV set?"

"You know what I want. I won't ask you where Barnabas is. Just tell me, when will he be out?"

"Megan said in about a week." Willie lied, hoping that Iris would not catch him at it.

"I hope she knows what she is doing."

"She is." The order had been clear. Keep Barnabas away from Iris's sexual demands until he could handle them properly.

"You know that it does not do any good to his mind to be locked in a coffin."

"He isn't locked up. I mean, the lid is open and he watches TV. He saw 'Casablanca' the other night and loved it."

"I still think he should be let out."

* * *

It was warm outside. But Carolyn didn't care for it. Roger was out there, enjoying his freedom for a little while longer...

But then...Then he'd be taken away and she'd be all alone. Only the servants would be left... And they were so busy plotting how to steal from her...

If only Jeb hadn't been killed...If at least she had a child by him...

But there was no child now. The nursery had joined the locked rooms in the house. Spiders built their webs there. The wallpaper detached itself by tenths of an inch every day. The paint chipped off the crib...

It was the end of the line for the Collins family. At last she had full control of the company, after Roger had signed the papers disinheriting David. With the kind of charges he was facing, David would never be able to contest that.

But what was the point of owning the factory? She had no one to leave it to. Who would get it when she died? David's children? Some cousin out of the boondocks? Or...the thought chilled her...Barnabas?

Unlike Angelique she didn't have all the time in the world. She'd better have a kid now. Married or single, it didn't matter. But she had to do it before the odds were too great that he'd have Downs syndrome...

"It will be a beautiful kid" she said to herself "And I'll raise him right. No cheap stuff for him."

The Collins were so cheap...like her mother, running away with her daughter's fiancé. Like Quentin, the Jesus Freak. Like Barnabas, the social worker.

But they were not meant to be cheap. And her child would no be.

* * *

Maggie watched as her staff mailed the newsletter to her constituents. They would all be in the mail tomorrow.

Newsletters were very useful. For one thing, they reminded the voters that you were still around and working "for their sake". For another, they provided her with a means of communicating with Megan without drawing attention.

She had with her the newsletter over which she had written with invisible ink. She only had to add that envelope to the pile.

Joe. It was because of Joe that he had had that nightmare. And she'd have more for at least a week. It always happened that way.

Maybe she should have confronted Barnabas with it long ago. Well, she'd lost her chance for that. And now it would be inconvenient to lose the power she had over him.

Why had Joe sent her the card?

Joe has to be taken care of. Maybe that card meant nothing, but maybe Joe wanted to make trouble. Maybe he wanted her to remember that they had been engaged once. He had forgotten that she was on the way up, while he was a released mental patient.

As a political liability he was even worse than Barnabas. And unlike Barnabas he was not useful.

Maybe he should be sent back to Wyncliffe. A relapse. Megan could arrange that. After all, it would be the same thing that sent him a way the first time...

It should be done quickly. Before someone noticed the name Maggie Evans among the Wyncliffe patients.

Better tell Megan to clean up those records, too...

She went to the girl closing envelopes at the end of the room.

"You've done quite a lot."

"Thank you, Ms. Evans" the girl said.

"I know that it is a pit that with a B.S. you have to spend so much time doing this kind of chores. But they must be done. And it is good to understand that little details count a lot.

"Yeah, I am learning all about the little details."

The edge of her voice told Maggie that after one more month of that kind of chores she'd start leaking that Representative Evans treated her female staffers no better than male Representatives did.

"There is a research project I'd like you to start work on, as soon as those letters are in the mail. Take it home to study it." She handed the folder to her. "See if you can come up with any ideas."

"For me?" she asked Maggie, not believing her luck.

She turned around so that she could read it better, and so enraptured she was with the documents that she never saw Maggie slip the Megan Todd envelope into the pile.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Megan paced the floor. She had wanted so much to meet Phillip, to be able to talk to him...and now that he said he wanted to meet her, she was scared.

What could she say to him? How could she explain? All the rehearsed speeches sounded so hollow..

Steadying her hands, she dialed the sheriff's office.

"George" she said into the phone "I'm going to see Phillip."

"Good for you."

"I need someone to,...to be with me."

"And you want me to be it?"

"Would you? I need somebody's arm around my shoulder."

George considered the situation before speaking.

"Why not call Barnabas?"

"Barnabas?"

"He's got a right to hear about it, too. As much right as Phillip. You know how that thing hurt him."

"George"

"I'm not judging you. But I think he should know about it."

"I know you are right."

"But it doesn't hurt less because of it, eh? Look you have to get it over. It is going to be hard, but it's got to be done."

"I...I'm afraid."

"I think that some Dutch courage is what you need."

"Damn you! Why do you have to be so practical? Why do I have to be? Why can't I just sit on the floor and cry until you come take care of me?"

"Don't we all wish we could do something like that?"

Megan hung up, then following George's advice, she poured herself some brandy which she mixed with dried blood to have it go down easily.

Somewhat steadier, she called Barnabas.

'Yes, Megan, what is it?" Barnabas answered distractedly while still leafing through a folder."

"I'm going to see Phillip. I want you to come with me."

"Now?" when would he get the time to catch up?"

"Please, come. It's important. I wouldn't ask for it if wasn't..."

"All right. I'll be there. You'll have to wait for me. I am grounded now."

"I know, I will pick you up in my car."

Not much later Barnabas sat on the passenger seat watching how Megan's hands trembled as she held the wheel.

"Are you all right?"

"Don't make me talk about it, please "she said softly "I will tell you and Phillip all about it. But not now."

"Wouldn't you rather have me drive?"

"I am not going to crash if that's worrying you."

Delia Harding saw both of them come along the corridor. It seemed as if Megan was slackening her pace, and only the fact that Barnabas held her arm kept her going.

"I guess I'd better leave you alone" Delia said.

Megan nodded. Somehow she seemed to have trouble forming words.

Barnabas answered for her. "That would be most kind, Miss Harding."

As he opened the door for Megan, Barnabas wondered briefly why Nurse Harding's neck wounds took so long to heal. But that thought left him quickly as he watched Megan and Phillip.

"Megan" Phillip extended his hand awkwardly. "I haven't seen you since..."

"You are just giving me your hand" Megan said in a strangled voice "No more embracing for the two of us."

"I...I'm sorry."

"Can't blame you. After all, it's been nine years ago. So much has happened since then."

She walked to the window and looked out into the yard. She felt weak and tired. But she forced herself to speak.

"Do you know how it is with me now? Do you know what I have to thank Jeb Hawkes for? Everybody in town knows that I am a nymphomaniac. Do you think I wanted that?"

'Jeb..." suddenly Barnabas understood.

"He had the idea that I would be easier to control if I had this hunger in me. A hunger that only he could satisfy." she turned to Phillip "You suspected that we were lovers...Lovers!" she laughed "That wasn't love. I had a hunger and he...he though it was funny the way I crawled to him for relief. So did Nicholas and Sky Rumsen when he loaned me to them. Rumsen didn't tell you that, Barnabas? When he came to you crying that I had hurt him? Well, I had a right to. He was sly even then. I made him sign checks in my name.

I wanted to take as much money from him as I could. But he postdated the checks, and hoped that I would get killed before I could cash them... But it was him that died, and I was left with a lot of useless checks."

Megan stopped, trying to stop her mounting hysteria.

"About you and me" she looked at Barnabas "about what happened, it was as much my fault as it was yours. I wanted you to...to have sex with me. But I was too ashamed to ask for it. Because of Jeb...And because I could not say it, and could not stop going to you, you went too far, and now Phillip is afraid of me touching him."

"Megan" Phillip managed to make his voice calm. He wanted to say something by couldn't well figure what. "Megan" he repeated.

She moved towards the bed.

"It is too much for you, isn't it? You'd rather I wasn't here?"

She realized her eyes were moist. God! She hadn't cried since...since she had been told that Phillip was dead, and it was her fault.

"Please, don't cry" Phillip managed to say.

Megan sat on the bed, looking away from Phillip. Making sure she didn't touch him in any way.

"I will give you a divorce. There is no way that you and I can stay married. I need a different man every night...There are many women in town who could make you a good wife " her voice broke

Barnabas started to move, then realized that it was not up to him, but to Phillip to say or do anything.

He did. Slowly he let his hand rest on Megan's shoulder.

"Megan...I don't know what to say. I don't hate you. I don't despise you. I like you..."

"But you don't love me anymore?"

"I'm not sure. I'm confused. I have no memory of what went on between 1970 and now. I don't know what I did. I want to...to get a grip on myself...It hurts me to see you cry."

Megan turned, and buried her face on Phillip's chest.

Barnabas decided it was best for him to disappear and leave them to straighten their differences.

As he went down to the waiting room he saw Chris near the door.

"Chris! What are you doing here? I thought that you were out."

"I am. Both me and Amy. But Sabrina's still in. She doesn't want to follow doctor's orders. How's your shoulder?"

Barnabas winced. "Better, but it still hurts."

"Good, that will teach you to mess around with my sister." Chris gave him a genuinely cordial smile as he said this.

"Oh, Chris. I'm so sorry. I must have been crazy..."

"I know. I didn't react any better than you did when I found out. But since David wasn't around we were spared the slaughter. God, when you think of it... Heroin. Smack, Horse... Even the words hurt."

"How's Amy doing?"

"Quite well. She's living with me now. And the sheriff finally stopped coming to pick her brain. I know...I know... that was the bargain we struck to keep Amy out of jail. But I still don't like the idea of him using my sister to advance his career."

"Now that Julia's coming back, it might be a good idea to let her talk to Amy."

"Are you saying that Amy's crazy?" Chris said harshly.

"Chris, you don't need to be crazy to need a psychiatrist..

"Why else would you need one?

"I' see one if I was depressed. Or if I felt hurt. Or if I had just kicked a drug habit and wanted to stay clean..."

Chris growled, unconvinced.

"Anyway, as soon as Julia gets here I'll ask her to do something about David."

It took some will power for Chris not to say that David should be fed to the sharks.

"Well, speaking of something else, how's that factory coming along?"

"Stalled" Barnabas sighed "I shouldn't blame Willie for it. But he was so eager to bring any kind of business here that he didn't notice that their labor practices were atrocious. I guess I'll aver to start from scratch again. How about you?

"I am quitting the business."

"What does Sabrina say?

"She likes the idea." Chris lied. "I was more of a fifth wheel there, anyway."

"But why do you want to quit?"

"It was a dirty business. I decided it was time to get an honest job."

"You want mine?" Barnabas asked too quickly.

"You don't like it?"

"There is more to live than just shuffling papers. At least there should be," Barnabas sighed. "the paperwork is more in control now, thanks to Frank. But if I could figure out a better way to earn a living, I'd quit."

"Hey! Why don't the two of us go into business together?"

"What kind of business?"

"Raising worms."

"Worms! Why should anyone raise worms?"

"To sell to anglers, farmers, dog food companies, hamburger chains..."

"You mean they put worms in hamburgers? Ugh..."

"What you do care? You don't eat at those places. And it is all protein. It probably has more vitamins and minerals, and less cholesterol."

Barnabas shoot his head, not convinced.

"What do you say? We could put them in your cellar..."

"No, Chris. Thanks, but no."

"Why?" Chris was hurt.

"Much too risky. I cannot quit my job like that. The truth is that there are too few openings for someone who can't keep a nine-to-five schedule." He saw Chris' objecting and forestalled it. "I know that you don't intend to go bankrupt, but it might happen. Funny, isn't it? Never worried about money before. Never had to. As Joshua Collins' son I could always count on my bills being paid, no matter what. And later...later is wasn't much of a problem until Willie finally told me that the free ride was over. And I still don't know how to make a proper budget and live within in...Chris, if I could afford to, I'd invest in your worms, you know that.

* * *

Megan clung to Phillip. She let the warmth of his body reach her. He still smelled the same, she noticed. That particular Phillip smell that she thought she'd never meet again. His skin felt familiar. Her fingertips recognized the texture as they moved over it.

She rubbed her face against his chest. Before she realized it, she was inching towards his throat. Her lips just parted, and she never knew when her fangs pierced his flesh.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Maggie had found that the usual medicine of shopping in Georgetown still worked. At least, it kept her mind off her dreams.

She was still having them. That card! Why would Joe send it? Well, it didn't matter. Megan would take care of that problem.

And anyway, those dreams were not so important. So she had a bad night or two...they went away by themselves and everything was back to normal.

The problem was that they kept coming back.

So...one week here...one week there...it didn't keep her from doing her job. Dreams or not dreams, she could still get bills in an out of committees. She could still run her staff. She could still get re-elected. And she could keep Barnabas from being too much of a nuisance.

Must she blow all this because of a childish need for revenge?

What Barnabas had done to her in 1967 has been pretty rotten, agreed. But what was to be gained with confronting him? For one thing, he had been crazy at that time. For another, it would be most unwise to confront him.

She had to face it. She had been exploiting that episode ever since her memory had broken the block that Julia Hoffman had placed on it. She had found it very useful to control Barnabas.

If she went to him and started screaming at him, giving back all that fear and bitterness, making him face his own ugliness, what would she gain? A few moments of satisfaction. What would she lose? Her hold over him.

Barnabas was probably the only none in the USA who hadn't yet heard of Proposition 13. He was always asking her to vote for more and more programs, for more and more spending.

Well, up to now it had been easy to handle him. Each time he looked as if pushing something she knew didn't have the slightest chance of being passed and which would make her unpopular, she'd just hum the tune of Josette's box. As soon as she did, he turned green, and the matter was gracefully dropped.

Without that, she'd have to give him long explanations. and he might not believe them. He might get mad. he might accuse her of betraying her principles. He might even go to work for an opposing candidate.

So it stood to reason that she was not to stir old memories.

And anyway, she did not think she'd have another dream like that tonight. One week was the maximum it took, and a week had been past.

There was a new shop on the block. At least one she had not seen before. She went in.

Straight ahead of her, over one of the tables, was Josette's music box...

* * *

Megan lighted her fourth cigarette with the butt of the third. Sooner or later she'd have to go out. She couldn't be holed up there forever.

But if she went out, she'd go to the hospital...into Phillip's room,...in his arms...in his vein...

Why had she done it? Hadn't she told herself a thousand times that it made no sense?

Phillip couldn't be happy with her. She couldn't be happy with Phillip. Specially after nine years.

Yet she had done it. She had told everyone that it couldn't happen, that it shouldn't happen, then she had gone ahead and done it.

"I have always been sensible. I have always known what was reasonable and what wasn't. And I've always done the reasonable thing. Why can't I do it now?"

She opened her mail, more to keep her hands busy than for any curiosity for the contents.

She read them out of habit. Junk mail had a way of finding her mailbox, rain on shine...

Maggie's newsletter was there, too.

She checked the invisible ink. Not that she cared, but to keep herself busy. And who knows, there might be an important message there.

There was one. Urgent, in fact. Meet Maggie as soon as possible in DC.

In good shape was she to be traveling to DC...

In excellent shape indeed! If she was away, she could keep away from Phillip more easily. And when she got back...Maybe when she got back she'd be sensible again.

Thinking about it, there was something that she could do for Barnabas. With so much worrying about Phillip, she had forgotten that there was a nice temporary solution to the unemployment problem in town..

If she stopped musing about her own problems it would be better for everybody, including herself.

Soon she was at the door of Barnabas' office. There were voices coming from the inside, so she decided to wait until Barnabas was done with his visitor.

"I cannot guarantee anything" Nicholas said "A cure for your condition is not that easy. But I'd like to try."

"Why?"

"I want to make it up to you for...for everything."

'You've reformed?" Barnabas' tone said how unlikely he thought that to be.

"I will try to stay on the straight and narrow."

"And use me for a guinea pig? And of course, if you haven't reformed at all, I'll find out what kind of strings are attached to your help."

"No strings attached."

"I wish I could believe you." Barnabas stared ahead, not seeing Nicholas. "I remember there was a time when I would have done anything, paid any price, to be free of my curse. That was before I met Jeb Hawkes. If nothing else, he taught me that some prices are just too high... I wish so much that I could trust you. But I don't care to find out what the price tag might be."

"I want to change my life.. If you'd only give me a chance..."

"I hope you do change...You have my best wishes on that. But I won't put myself in your hands."

"I see. Then you will ask the sheriff to run me out of town?" Nicholas put all the self-pity he could muster in his words.

"Why should I?"

"The sheriff is your friend. And you don't like me?"

"So? Who do you take me for? Anita Bryan? You have certain rights under the Constitution. And whether I like you or not does not change anything. You are a child of the Universe, like the sun and the trees. And you have as much right to be here as they. I just won't put myself in your hands."

Nicholas left, grumbling. Not only he had gotten nowhere, but he also had to put up with Barnabas' moralizing.

Barnabas had barely time to go back to his papers when Megan came in.

"How am I supposed to get any work done if people keep coming in and out as if this was Grand Central Station?" he grumbled, without lifting his eyes.

"I want to talk business with you." Megan said calmly. Now that she had charted a course for herself and was sure of it, she could talk easily.

"Business?"

"The factory you were supposed to bring here."

"I don't like them" he sighed "but I might have to swallow my objections. Time is running out and people are getting impatient. Even if they can go deer hunting, they are suffering."

"I can give you some more time."

"How?" he said that in the same tone he had received Nicholas' news that he had reformed.

"If Carolyn had a large order in an account she was afraid to lose, she'd have to start hiring again."

"And you think you can?"

"I know which accounts she has, and which ones she cares most about. I'll find the people involved and make them place the order."

"The same way you made Frank do that report?"

"The same way I got you the documents you needed. What do you say?"

"That I hope you can pull it!" Barnabas got up and embraced her impulsively.

His shoulder reminded him that he was not supposed to do that.

"Does it still hurt?"

"Only when I move." he shrugged the other shoulder. "In a way, it has been a godsend. You remember all those propositions I used to receive? Right after I worked their necks?"

"Those things that made you flip? Yes, I remember.

"Well, now they just poke me on the shoulder. It is still painful, but more bearable."

"You making the rounds again?"

"Yes. Only I can't fly. I have to call ahead, and ask them to open the door for me."

"How long do you think you can keep from Iris that you are up and about? Anyone of them can tell her. Then you'll have to give a long explanation."

"Let me worry about Iris."

"OK. I will leave town tonight. I'll pack, tell George goodbye, and I'll be on my way."

"I thought you wanted to stay longer with Phillip."

"I'm going anywhere near Phillip" Megan said through clenched teeth.

"Why?" and as soon as he asked, he knew the answer. "So it happened between you two?"

"Yes" Megan's voice dropped. "This is not like one of my one-night-stands. There is only one way it would end. So I'm putting as much distance as I can between us two. When I come to my senses, I will return."

"I see...Is there anything I can do?"

"No...well, maybe you could explain things to Phillip" she kissed him impulsively "tell him that I...I think it's best if we keep apart."

"I will" he embraced her, trying not to pay attention to the pain. "take care of yourself."

"You too." she laid her head against Barnabas's chest "tell me, why do things have to be so complicated. Why can't they be simple, for a change?"

"I wish I knew" He was thankful that Megan did not attempt to lay her head on his shoulder. He was conscious of something wet touching his chest, and realized that Megan was crying.

"It will be all right, you'll see" he said, patting her back.

Megan tore herself from him, as if ashamed of having been so weak in his presence.

"It will fix itself in the end. it always does." she said before she disappeared.

Barnabas rubbed his eyes, still shocked to understand that underneath Megan's armor there was real pain.

She was always the tough one, the reliable one. No matter what happened she would fall on her feet. But inside her armor...

As he filled forms mechanically he remember her confession to him and Phillip.

It explained so much about her. It even explained why she had kept throwing herself at him in 1970, when he had begged her not to.

It was surprising how little difference it made to him, now. It 1970 it would have meant the world to know that he hadn't been the only one to blame for her...accident. In 1980 it was just a piece of useful information to be filed and processed in his mind, like so many other pieces of information.

Maybe it was because Megan had made herself so useful , so much a part of the everyday scene that sometimes you forgot she hadn't always been like this...

There were more papers to be processed. The stuff without which Civilizations As We Know It couldn't exist...Nobody had found a civilization that did not require bureaucrats.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Louella walked along the shore, looking at the sea below her feet. As she walked, the waves broke on the rocks, one after the other.

'...And sometimes bodies broke on the rocks...As had happened to Jeb Hawkes...

She didn't want to thing about it. But the waves kept beating, keeping a rhythm. And behind that rhythm, she could hear her name.

"We got all of them" the waves seemed to say "We got you once. We'll get you again."

Louella shook herself. Where did she get those ideas, anyway? Why think of that?

The face of the girl she had found in the locket peered at her through the water.

Why should that girl matter? She was probably dead by now...

Why did her fainting spells continue? Since that day she had found the locket, she had been enduring them.

The girl's name was Beth Chavez. She should ask Quentin about her.

But Quentin wasn't here. Still away. Always promising to come back. Always finding an excuse not to.

Now he was with that woman...Sister Kira... a healer, better than Kathryn Kuhlman, he said.

And she had been left behind. Because it was difficult to explain their relationship. But, he had said, as soon as Willie granted her a divorce, they could be married, and everything would be all right.

At least Megan hadn't come back for her. And Barnabas kept his distance too. He had seen Barnabas two days ago, at a distance. He had broken a bone, and walked around with a look of pain in his face...

"And surely Willie is keeping him company" her fists closed remembering how Willie had betrayed her "Why did Willie lie to me?"

She moved closer to the edge. It was dangerous to be close, she knew, but it somehow cleared her mind. Standing there, she could understand Quentin, and herself, better.

"Sister Kira..." she thought aloud "what did she look like?" Quentin hadn't told her anything. She hadn't even thought of asking him. Why hadn't she? Didn't she know Quentin any better?"

A very gifted woman...a devoted Christian...Yes, Quentin, Yes. But what did she look like?

Willie had hung around Barnabas. He never explained anything and she never asked. She just trusted him. As she now trusted Quentin.

"How old is Sister Kira, Quentin?" she shouted to the waves "Is she pretty? Is she prettier than me? Is that why you left me behind?

"You are not better than Willie was!" she screamed angrily "You are tired of me!" she continued, not fully understanding the words she was saying. "As you got tired of Jenny! As you threw me away like an used rag so that you could marry Angelique! As you threw Angelique away so that you could run after Amanda Harris! And then your drove me over the edge on Widow's Cliff so I wouldn't try to follow you! I died on the rocks because of you!"

She moved one step closer to the edge. It was a long drop... and the rocks slashed her body with their sharp edges, as the barnacles had torn her skin...

She looked down the abyss...there were answers there too. If she could remember what they were. She moved a little closer...

"Louella!" she heard somebody cry.

She didn't move.

"Don't get too close" Willie said, pulling her back. "you might fall."

"Sir..." Louella said, not recognizing him.

"Look, Lou, don't talk to me if you don't want to. But don't stay so close."

"You are mistaken sir. My name is not Louella. It is Beth Chavez."

* * *

Sabrina enjoyed the warmth of the sun as it filtered into her room. It was such a beautiful day outside. And maybe soon she would be out.

She had to face it. She was more to blame for her situation than anybody else, and getting angry wouldn't change it.

She had mishandled the sting. She should have made sure she could not be cut off from her escape route.

Of course, it was also David's fault for drugging Chris. And it was Barnabas who had sent David and Amy to her.

But who had insisted, against Chris protests, that Amy should come stay with them? Just in the middle of a delicate operation like that? Why couldn't they have taken Urrey in, instead?

She had wanted to score a point against Chris, that's why.

So Barnabas hadn't know any better than to dump those kids on her. But nobody paid Barnabas to think these things through. That was her job.

She better reorder her priorities if she wanted to keep her agency and her husband.

Chris came in, smiling, with some magazines under his arm.

Sabrina smiled back. Good old Chris. How could she have forgotten all his good points?

"How are you doing, honey?"

"Improving. I finally decided to cooperate with the doctor.

"Glad to hear it."

"I'm going to do a lot more of that. Pay more attention to what people tell me. So how is the agency doing?"

"The agency...er..." Chris thought it better to tell her the news while she was still in a good mood. "You remember that you told me that you didn't want to do business with Megan anymore."

"Yes...Chris!" she said with alarm. "You know that we cannot buy her off, yet."

"Oh, no" he paused for effect " that's why I let her buy us off, instead."

"You did what?"

"I sold her our shares."

"Are you crazy or what? You sold her my agency? After the way I slaved to put it on its feet?"

"Sabrina..."

"And who gave you authority to sell my shares, anyway? I am going to contest it, don't worry. You are not selling my agency to anybody. Certainly not to Megan."

"Sabrina, please."

"I don't want to sell my agency and that's final."

"You know full well that the agency would not have lasted the first year without Megan's under the table money!"

"The agency was _my_ idea. From the start. I fought for it. It was you who let Megan turn it into a front for her other activities!"

"We'd not have lasted two weeks without that." Chris felt a mixture of embarrassment and anger steal on him.

"We could. But you chose to develop expensive tastes."

"We had to impress prospective clients!"

"Impress the waitresses at the Blue Whale, you mean! It was _my_ idea. I built that agency. You just used it. And now you sell it to that...that whore!"

"Your forget all that Megan's done for us. If it wasn't for her, I'd still be inside that cage, chained every full moon. And wondering what would have happened to you if I ever got loose."

"Julia could have cured you."

"The way she cured Barnabas? So, say she cured me. You wouldn't have had your agency at all, as too many jobs involving me following scents and doing shadowing jobs as a dog."

"They involved a lot of other things. But you wouldn't know about them. All you know is how to follow scents.! You never bothered to learn about the business!"

"I learned enough about it! I learned that without Megan it would have gotten nowhere!"

"It would, if I was in charge of it!"

"Don't be stubborn!" Chris could barely control his rage.

"Stubborn? I am stubborn now? You come to me with a Mickey Mouse idea and I am stubborn because I don't like it?" She got up from bed and move towards him.

"I warn you..." Chris could barely control himself any longer. That bitch ought to be taught one thing or two. Order him around. would she? He closed his fists and took a short step towards her.

"Is it threats, now?"

Chris hit Sabrina in the face. She fell down. Chris kicked her with her foot. She needed a good thrashing. She needed to be taught how to talk to him.

Sabrina retreated from his blows. She got hold of the button to call the nurse, and pressed it.

"Say another word...another word, you bitch.."

"Mr. Jennings has just hit me. Will you please call the doctor to make sure nothing's broken? And get me a lawyer, too."

"You won't do anything of the sort!" Chris blocked the nurse's way."

"You hit her, Chris, you go to jail for assault. You are not married to her, so no excuse will help you."

Anger built inside Chris. Sabrina was right. And it wasn't fair! Why should she always win in the end! His rage mounted. It had to make explosion or he would die of it...

A growl rose in his throat and the hairs in the back of his neck bristled. It wouldn't take too long to tear off the throat of the nurse...

Sabrina understood. She looked at the bed stand, but there was nothing there she could use.

"Do you have silver on you?" she whispered to the nurse

"A ring. I do not know if it is real silver."

"Give it to me."

Chris dropped to the floor, and his face lengthened and his hands became paws. He crouched, growling.

"This is a silver ring" Sabrina said aloud, showing it to Chris.

Chris jumped. Sabrina caught his muzzle with the ring, hitting hard.

Chris fell to the side whimpering, as he always did when silver touched him in his wolf form.

Sabrina stood over him as he changed shape again.

"You lost control of the wolf" she told him "it is back to the chains and cage for you."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Maggie stirred her coffee. She wondered if she should spike it with booze to celebrate having come through another nightmare.

It was that box, she knew. That damn box.

Why had she gone into that shop? Why did she hang around Georgetown so much? She knew that it was getting late. Yet she kept going from shop to shop, as if searching for something...

As if she knew what she would find.

Baloney! How could she imagine she would find Josette's box?...but she kept going to antique shops, didn't she?

Didn't she know what she may find in an antique shop? After all, Josette du Pre hadn't been the only one to own such a box.

She had failed to confront Barnabas., and now she was giving herself reasons to do so. Bad reasons, but the more compelling for it...

She looked at the package. The box was still wrapped inside. Maybe she should leave it there. Hide it under all her clothes. Throw it into the Potomac...

She unwrapped the box. She had paid for it. Might as well look at it.

Yes. It was Josette's box, all right. Just as she remembered it.

But...but it was just an imitation. Made in Japan. The label was there, at the bottom. Some enterprising manufacturer had found an old model and decided to turn out copies... The had mentioned that at the shop, hadn't they?

The box might be imitation, but the nightmares it brought were the real thing...

She wondered what kind of music it would play. Would the imitation be faithful enough to have the same music? Or would they have a popular tune to help with their sales?

She lifted the lid and listened...

"Bridge over troubled waters" by Simon and Garfunkel.

* * *

Nicholas knocked at Carolyn's door. If Barnabas wouldn't hire him, she might.

She had to. Not that there weren't other prospects, but none that looked as good as Mrs. Hawkes.

He smiled. She owed him for giving her a husband...

If she didn't hire him, then he'd have to look again. Joe Haskell? He might want revenge. But he didn't have much money. Quentin Collins? He'd have to convert first...

The door opened to let him in.

As the maid led him to Carolyn Hawkes he rehearsed his speech again. If he blew it...

He was surprised to see how gloomy Collinwood locked. Not that it had been such a happy place when he had been there last. But at least, it had been alive. There were human beings there who fought for their happiness. They might lose, but they still fought.

But now the fight was over.

Carolyn Stoddard Hawkes stood in front of him. Once she had been Carolyn Stoddard and sweet sixteen. Once.

"Mrs. Hawkes" he said in his most unctuous voice "I know that I am imposing on your time. I want you to consider that I might yet be of service to you."

"Cut the speeches" Carolyn said with a curt gesture "you are selling something and want to see if I want to buy. What is it that you are selling?"

"My services. I understand that you need friends in this town."

Carolyn gave a bitter laugh. "I am not that desperate for friends yet that I would take you for one. But if you want to rent yourself by the hour I might be interested. What can you do?"

"I can find things...and make things happen."

"Have you got your powers back?"

"I am getting them back."

"You haven't gotten them back."

"Not yet." he spoke quickly, in fear of being thrown out. "I got some of them already. And every day they get stronger."

"Well, I guess that's better than nothing" she looked at him not bothering to hide her contempt. "You certainly have come down in the world. No chance of you playing any of your old tricks anymore."

"Everything changes, Mrs. Hawkes." he shrugged to show her his philosophical resignation to the twists and turns of fortune.

"Since you've learned your lesson, and won't try to bite off more than you can chew, I don't see why I should 't hire you. Yes." she added cruelly "A sight for sore eyes you are not. But you'll do."

"Oh, thank you, Mrs. Hawkes. You are most kind."

"He's already learned how to fawn" Thought Carolyn.

* * *

Barnabas filled the papers before him, but his mind was in other things.

...the factory...at least now he could have some extra time...

...Maybe he could pay a visit to Amy. The last one had been a disaster...

...Phillip. He had let George convince him that the town sheriff was better to give that kind of explanations. At least the news would get there faster. And George was a good friend of Megan's. He had even said, once that if things were different, he'd marry her...

...David. He had tried telling the medical staff that now, with the full moon over, they could ease off on the drugs they were giving him. The medical staff just have him the medical stare they reserved for laymen who presumed to tell them their business.

...Julia. Once Julia was here, he could get David out...

...What about Julia's husband? Had Julia told him about what kind of people he would be having for neighbors? If she didn't, he would find soon enough...had to make sure that Megan kept her paws off him until then...

...Of course, Megan had to keep her paws off anybody who might be coming to discuss business. But she hardly needed to be told that. The day when Megan scared money away, that day she could be packed off to Wyncliffe...

So he was gathering wool when Willie burst into his office.

"Barnabas, who is.. was.. Beth Chavez?

"One of Quentin's mistresses. In 1897.

"She's dead now?" There was a tense expectancy in his voice.

"She fell off Widow's Cliff."

"She fell...Oh, God!"

"Willie, what is it?" Barnabas rose, alarmed.

"Louella...she was close to the edge there, today. I pulled her off. And she looked at me like...like she did not recognize me. I called her by name, and she said that her name was Beth Chavez."

"She did?" Barnabas paced the floor "Where is she now?"

"Back at her...at Quentin's house...After she insisted once more that she was Beth Chavez, she became Louella again. She would not admit she had said what she did. She accused me of following her and making up that story to upset her."

"When Julia gets here...But Julia won't be here for a while..."

"I could try to get her committed, but Quentin will know how to stop me. And in her case it would not do any good. She's possessed, not crazy."

"We must have her watched. Make sure that she does not go near Widow's Hill. Stop her if she gets too close to the edge. And have her movements tracked so that Julia will have some idea of what she's up against."

"Is that all?"

"That, and be patient. We can't move until we know more. Or until she is in immediate danger."

"So we let Chris do most of the work."

"No, not Chris."

"Why not? We can afford him."

"He's getting out of the business. But I know of several people who could use the money. That would give us both day and night coverage.. "We would need someone who could get into the house. If Beth was one of Quentin's mistresses and Louella is living in Quentin's house, then the influence is there. But I am grounded..."

"Megan?"

"She's out of town..."

"Out of town? Now?"

"She got too close to Phillip..." Barnabas recalled the scene at the hospital. He shouldn't have left the two of them alone...And Nurse Harding...

Nurse Harding's wounds that looked to fresh to be the ones he had made...

"Willie, How well do you know Pearce? You know him well?"

"Why?"

"If we paid him to keep an eye on Louella at night, could he trust him?"

'He's not stupid. He wants our goodwill, and he can always use more money. He is reliable up to a point. But if he saw a chance for big money, he would do something stupid...But what does it matter? He's skipped town.

"No. He hasn't I know where he's hiding."

"You know?"

"We are going there now. But first we must stop at the sheriff's"

"Why?"

"We have to get him off the Ten Most Wanted list."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

George looked at Barnabas and Willie as they came in.

"If Barnabas ever goes AC/DC it will be with Willie, not me." he thought, briefly.

Well, that couldn't be helped. They seemed to be worried about something serious. Willie's expression was not that of a man having fun.

They came into the office. Barnabas sat down. Willie just walked over the place, as if unable to stop.

"You look better" George said to Barnabas, trying not to notice Willie's impatient gestures.

"Thank you." Barnabas decided to get to the point before Willie had a nervous collapse. "We need your help. It is about Pearce."

"Him again?" George clutched theatrically at his stomach. "what are the bad news this time?"

"Louella's going to jump off Widow's Hill and you just stay here clowning!" Willie wailed.

"She's not going to jump yet. But she's in trouble. We think that she's being possessed by a girl who fell off Widow's Hill after she tried to kill Quentin."

George let out a low whistle. "I can see why you are worried."

"We cannot do much. I was planning to have her watched. First to keep her from hurting herself. And second, so that we can know more of the situation. Pearce can watch her closely when she's alone at night. Might even hear her talk in her sleep... We have to use Pearce. I'm grounded, and Megan's out of town."

"I know. I talked to Phillip.

"What did he say?" Barnabas tried not to notice Willie's huffing.

"He called you every name in the book." George shrugged. "but in the end he accepted the situation. Are you really serious about hiring Pearce? I wouldn't trust him in any grounds."

"Willie thinks we can."

"He...thinks so." George shrugged "And you want me to make sure that he doesn't get arrested if we see him on the street?"

"Will you?"

George considered it. "You know, there is absolutely nothing you can do with a character like him. There is nothing in the Penal Code, in Police Regulations, not even in the Constitution that tells you what to do with a vampire who is a petty thief. Letting him go free is out of the question. No jail can hold him. Killing him is going back to the bad old days when you hung pickpockets...I guess we might as well improvise. All right, he's all yours. If you can find him."

"I know where he is."

"In Delia Harding's house."

A few moments later Barnabas and Willie were in the driveway of Nurse Harding's house.

"Are you sure he's there? And what if she doesn't let us in?"

"Are you going to worry now about looking like a fool? As for getting in...it may need some acting. You just let me do the talking and try to stay in character."

He hadn't been at Delia Harding's house for quite a while. If it was up to him, he would not go back. Well, having Willie with him would prevent her from making a pass at him.

They knocked at the door.

"Is that you?" Delia growled at them from the barely open door. "I'm busy. I don't have the time for you."

Delia had never done that to him. So, if she did not, it meant that she already had someone else, who was probably willing to do as she liked.

"It is not for me. It's for him." he pointed at Willie. "It's about his wife."

"What do I have to do with her?"

"That's what I have been trying to tell him. But he doesn't' listen. He's got the idea that you know of something. How he got that idea..."

"What did Louella tell you? She talked to you, didn't she?" Willie's acting was bringing him dangerously close to real hysterics.

"But...but I know nothing." Delia considered the situation. Somebody in Willie's state wouldn't be convinced. that easily. He might well park himself on her doorstep until the end of the month.

Barnabas saw her hesitate and decided to help her think. "I think that if you listened to him, and tried to explain yourself, he might calm down."

She still hesitated.

"It's cold, too. You cannot let him freeze out here. He might use some hot coffee."

Delia let them in.

"I saw you with Louella the other day. You were talking, the two of you. What did she say to you?" Willie spoke quickly as Barnabas looked around the room.

"I didn't talk to her. You must have me confused with someone else."

"I believe you." Barnabas said calmly "Where is Pearce?"

"Pearce who?"

"The one who smoke these cigarettes" Barnabas picked up a stub from an ashtray "I recognize the smell."

"I smoked them" Delia's face closed.

"All right, Derek" Barnabas said aloud. "Are you coming out now, or do I have to come back with the sheriff?"

The bedroom door opened and Derek came out. Willie noticed his leather jacket and wondered what Barnabas made of it.

"All right. I give up. What do you want me for?"

"I can arrange to have the police off you. But only if you do a job for us."

"What kind of a job?"

"I want you to follow my wife as closely as possible."

"Follow her? What for? Don't you have evidence already for a divorce?

"She's being possessed" Willie said dramatically.

"Are you putting me on? Possessed?

"A lot worse things have happened in this town."

"So? Do I look like an exorcist? That kind of stuff isn't my bag. All I know is how to perform wallectomies. That's what I stick to. Only time I didn't, got a five year stretch."

"Leave him alone!" Delia intervened "you have no right to draft him like this."

"We don't expect you to do it for free." Barnabas continued. "All you have to do is hang around her. Pay attention to what she does. Stop her if she tries to hurt herself, or puts herself in danger. You don't need a Ph.D. for that. And you need the money. Why else would you have gotten involved with Roger?"

"Blame Mrs. Jennings for that. She made me ditch my car. Since I am officially dead, I cannot collect the insurance on it. And a good car costs money." he smiled. "Also your cousin was such a pigeon... And I believe that it is morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money."

"It didn't come as one of your best ideas. In fact, I wonder when it was the last time you had a good idea."

"You don't think much of me, do you?" Derek stared at Barnabas.

"I cannot make heads or tails of you."

"Oh, stop talking and tell us whether or not you want the job!" Willie said angrily.

"Be patient, Willie" Derek said softly. "Remember that it was impatience that landed you in the Big House. Just let me say my piece and then I'll give you an answer."

"As for you" he said coldly to Barnabas "what can you possibly know about me? Have you ever been down and out? Did you have to live in a dump because it was all you could afford?" his eyes went out of focus. "did you ever have to live on rats, because you could not pay for the powdered stuff? Did you ever live on cats, so that you could skin them afterwards and make some money from their skins? Did you ever have to share your space with junkies?...Do you even know what a junkie is?"

"Yes" Barnabas said, thinking of Amy.

"I tried to avoid them there. They scared me. They scared me because there were times... times when I was feeling down that I envied them...And one day I would... Actually I did. There was this girl who kept hanging around. She she was high, nothing bothered her. ...One day, when things got to be too much, I found her sitting on the pavement. She was smiling. I knew that there was a poison inside her, and that it was the poison that made her smile. But I didn't care. She was smiling.,...so I went and stole a fix from her."

"Stole a fix?"

"Never heard the expression, eh? Never mind... I bit her. But the only reason why I wanted her blood was because there was heroin in it...The next day she was gone. In the hospital with hepatitis. Lucky for me, because if no, I would have kept going to her until I started borrowing her needles... That's when I decided that I had to get out, no matter what. I did get out. With the Mob's money. That's how I ended here."

Barnabas was silent for a few moments, then he said, more to himself than to Pearce "So that's what Megan means when she says that I don't know how lucky I am."

Delia stood there, her hands closing into fists behind her back.

"So now, what? She snapped, at nobody in particular.

"Well, Delia." Pearce had resumed his disingenuous smile. "It would be a good thing if I wasn't wanted by the police anymore."

"A good thing for you." Delia said between clenched teeth.

"For you, too. You can't be accused of harboring a fugitive." he turned to Barnabas "I'll take the job."

"Good. Come to my office later and we'll work out the details. In the meantime, get yourself settled."

"You bet. There are some things I have to straighten up."

"You want to move out?" Delia asked.

"Why, you don't want me anymore."

"You don't need me. You don't have to hide. And now that you'll be making money, you can pay yourself for the powdered stuff."

Barnabas started to say something, but a well directed kick in the ankle by Willie made him shut his mouth.

"You can throw me out any time you want." Derek's face softened as he spoke to Delia "For now, I'd rather not move."

As they went out, Barnabas turned towards Derek. "One thing, don't get any ideas about taking my money and splitting. You haven't seen me real angry yet."

"That was some threat you made" Willie was amused s he started the car "when you get real angry...boy I have seen you real angry."

"When was that? In 67?" Barnabas tensed.

"No" Willie lied.

"I wonder what I did then when I was...angry."

"Something crazy. You were nuts, then." Willie decided to change conversation fast "I'm sorry I kicked you, but you were going to mention Delia's neck wounds."

"It seemed strange that since she was already paying for powdered blood, he should have bit her too."

"It would have embarrassed him. I don't think he cares to have you know that Delia is playing SM with him."

"Sm?"

"Sadomasochism. Whips and chain stuff. You saw him, wearing a leather jacket in the bedroom. I know that he didn't have one when he moved here. Delia must have given it to him...Biting is just part of their repertory.

Barnabas shuddered.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Chris Jennings looked down at the sea. His mind could barely hold his confused thoughts.

How could he have done what the did? How could he have tried to kill Sabrina?...He had gone on all fours and tried to tear her throat.

Sabrina had said that the wolf was out of control. She had been mad at him...She had wanted to hurt him... But still it may be true.

She may have said it out of spite. Yet...if it was true.

_If it was true._

What could he do? Try to hold on a little longer? Go back to the cage and chains?

Maybe he should just jump and be done with.

No, that was the coward's way. And he wasn't certain yet that the wolf was out of control..

But if it was true?

He didn't want to die. Not yet. It as only in these last years that he had begun to enjoy life.

But he wouldn't enjoy life so much if he had to go back to the chains...

And Amy? Who would take care of her? He had failed her once, and she had become an addict. Could he desert her again by jumping?

"Hey Chris! What are you doing? Thinking of killing yourself?"

As Chris turned, Iris realized that she had chosen the wrong joke.

"Maybe I will.

"What happened?" Iris sat down next to Chris.

"I nearly killed Sabrina."

Iris gasped.

"I went on all fours and tried to tear off her throat."

"You lost control of the wolf?"

"I'm not sure I don't recall wanting to change. I...I think I might be reverting."

"How did that happen?"

"We were fighting, the two of us. Then I got mad, real mad."

"Oh, that's different."

"How could it be different?"

Iris sighed. Chris could be quite a knucklehead at times...

"If you were fighting, you might have wanted to, even if you don't want to remember it now."

"I'd never do that"

That was probably what had happened, but Chris did not want to admit it...so she gave him something else that would comfort him.

"What did David dope you with?"

"What does it have to do?"

"It might be a delayed reaction."

Whatever reaction had been, it was likely to be over by now. but Chris, was eager for anything that would give him hope.

"You think it might be that? The doctors said that it was all over. They could not find anything wrong with me when I left the hospital.

"How many O. werewolves do you think they have experience with?

"Probably I am the first. yes, that's probably it. The wolf is out of control because of a delayed reaction.

"It will wear off after a while."

"Yes." Chris smiled, then his face lengthened again. "When will it clear off? I am not better off than before. It might last forever."

"Just to be on the safe side, do not get into situations where you may lose your temper.

"Small chance of that. You don't know what Sabrina is like. I had come to see her, tell her I wanted to patch things up. How I wanted to start my life anew...Instead..."

"Have you considered divorce?

"Divorce? I don't believe in divorce.

"You believe in tearing your wife's throat out?"

Chris bristled at her words. There was something in the cool, competent voice of Iris that grated him.

There always had been voices like that around him. Sabrina, Megan, Jullia Hoffman...Voices that always gave the right answers but never asked the right questions. Vices that always knew what he needed, never what he wanted.

He wanted Iris to be gone. She and her suggestions. Leave him alone, by the sea. Leave him alone to enjoy his despair.

Iris saw the hairs in the nape of Chris' nec, stand up. She wasn't sure, but she thought she heard a low growl.

She retreated, afraid. But she need not have worried. Chris had remembered something that would hurt her a lot more.

"Any news of Barnabas?"

"Willie says that he's still confined. He says that the collarbone heals slowly. I know you had a good reason to break it, but..

"Barnabas is up and about. In fact, he's been up and about for several days now."

"What?"

"I saw him when I went to see Sabrina, and that was a week ago. And had had bee up for a while.

"But...but why did Willie.."

"Because Barnabas asked him to. He wants to keep away from you. Thinks that you are bad for him.''

"Serve her right" Chris thought" she's such and expert on everybody else. Let her see what mess she has made of her own life.

* * *

"What is Collinsport like? Kenneth Anderson asked his wife.

"A small town. Mostly fishing. That and the summer tourist trade. Not far away from my sanitarium/"

"You seem to have made friends there."

"I managed to build a small practice there." Julia said.

"It is strange about this Barnabas Collins" Kenneth said thoughtfully while scratching his beard "You never mentioned him to me. And now he's called you at least twice..."

"We had a fight when I left." Julia wondered how much she could tell Kenneth. "He was my patient once. He reached the point when he thought he could teach me medicine. You know that kind of patient."

"They are a trial, all right."

"I was mad at him for a while. But I guess it is childish to carry a grudge forever. So I got in contact with him again."

"He doesn't carry a grudge either?"

"No. He's impatient to see me again. He can't understand why we can't get there faster. He says he has rounded up a couple of patients for me, already."

"You mean that you already have patients lined up?"

* * *

Dusk hadn't come yet when Iris parked herself in front of Barnabas' office.

"Should have done this from the start." she muttered to herself "make sure I didn't miss him."

She had to wait a while for him to show up, but she didn't care. This time he wouldn't get away. This time he'd give her the explanation she deserved.

Eventually, after darkness fell, she saw him coming.

"Hello!" she said "how are you doing?"

He recoiled from her She saw it and smiled bitterly.

"So Chris was right" she said "you think I am some kind of poison."

"I'm sorry. I wanted to explain..."

"Damn you! You think I am Julia Hoffman!" she screamed at him. " Do you think that you can pull your dumb act on me? If you don't want me, say so, and stop stringing me along.!"

Barnabas looked around. Some employees still worked late, and he didn't care to have them gossiping about him.

"Want to discuss it inside?"

"As long as we discuss it." they entered his office.

"Do you want some coffee? he offered.

"I want answers. Why didn't you want to see me?"

"I needed time to think. Look, my head was in a bad shape. I should have stayed longer recuperating, but David was caught and I had to try to do something... And then, between one thing and another...

"But you could have bothered to call me. Or at least have Willie tell me."

"I...you see, our relationship, I needed to think about that."

"And what did you realize, that I was bad for you?"

The image of Derek standing in his leather jacket stood in front of Barnabas as he answered. "Yes. I think that you are bad for me."

Iris reclined on her chair. "Well. Nobody will ever accuse you of being tactful. And in what way am I bad for you?"

"You just want me to play SM games with."

"You area joking."

"That's what Angelique told me and I didn't want to believe."

"Of course, Angelique. She doesn't play SM games. She goes for the real thing."

"She's right. Why did you take me as a lover? What's so special about me? These?" he tapped his mouth angrily.

"No!" Iris denied, not allowing herself to think of how much truth there might be in his accusation.

"Is that why you seduce me after...after I had finished?"

"Seduced? What are you going to claim next? That you were a virgin?"

"And when that didn't work for you anymore, you started demanding sex on the floor, or any place where I would be embarrassed. Did that satisfy you?

"You got it all wrong!"

"Really? I went over the edge and hurt Amy. But it was you that I wanted to hurt. I am still mad at you. And unless you want to find out how an SM game can turn into the real thing, I advise you to leave./

"Don't bother to show me the door." she said, rising. Then she added, at the door. "There was no need for all the melodrama. If told you from the start that we owed nothing to each other. If you got tired of me, all you had to do was say so. Well, that was your choice, not mine."

* * *

_...Barnabas dragged her by the arms..._

"_You are Josette Collins!" he shouted at her._

"_I'm not! I'm Maggie Evans!"_

"_You are who I say you are!"_

_He threw her into the open coffin. He closed the lid halfway in spite of the resistance of her arms._

"_You'll stay there until you say you are Josette Collins!"..._

Maggie tried to sake off the nightmare from her mind. But she couldn't. It clung to her skin, like sweat.

It was that box, that damn box...

Anger filled her. Why should she have the nightmares and not Barnabas?

She was going to mail him the box. Let him sweat for a change.

.."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Derek watched Louella from a distance. Tonight she was a very busy bee who kept doing errands instead of just staying at home waiting for Quentin's phone call.

This job was a lark. Very restful. Compared with the stuff he had to do to learn a few dishonest bucks...

"Maybe I would have saved myself a lot of headaches if I stayed in the straight and narrow..."

It was easy taking care of Louella, up to now. She went home early, she watched TV or paced a bit, She read, she fretted, and eventually she went to sleep. It took a while for her to fall asleep, and when she did, he could look into her papers, and those of Quentin, as Barnabas had asked him to. He hadn't found anything of interest, yet, but Barnabas was interested, so he did it.

There was a lot of free time involved. He didn't think that Barnabas would like his leaving the house after Louella had fallen asleep, and coming back to check more or less regularly. But what Barnabas did not know would not hurt him.

Louella had not tone anywhere towards Widow's Hill. To be sure, he checked on her sleeping pills, and she used them sparingly, yet...

Chris Jennings passed by. He had a strange expression on his face. As if, Derek thought, he was asking himself what was the meaning of life.

But then, nobody was paying him to worry about Chris Jennings

* * *

Barnabas knocked at Phillip's door.

Phillip's expression was not a welcoming one. But he didn't yell at him, at least.

"I am surprised you showed up. I thought that after the sheriff told you what I called you, you would keep away."

"George didn't dwell on the details." Barnabas sat on the bed.

Phillip paled and moved back so that he wouldn't have to touch Barnabas.

"Too bad. Some of them were real beauties."

"I imagine. I am sorry for what just happened. I should not have left the two of you together."

Phillip growled.

"What did you say?

"You don't want to know."

"No, I guess I don't" Barnabas paused for a moment. "Have you got any idea what you re going to do when they let you out?"

"I don't know. Why should you care?"

"I know you have no money. You were declared legally dead, and Megan inherited. She would have settled it, but she had to leave town."

"So I am up shit creek without a paddle?"

Barnabas winced at the expression but agree with it. "it seems that way."

"And you volunteered to give me the news."

"I came to offer you some help."

"Who says I want your help?"

"You have to accept help from somebody. This is not the moment to be proud."

"Pride is a luxury I can't afford anymore, it seems." Phillip sighed "So you'll work out your guilt by helping me."

"Nothing is going to take my guilt away. Anyway, by now I am a guilt , what do you call it? junkie. A guilt junkie. If I cannot find something to feel guilty about, I go into convulsions. If I help you now, it is because it needs doing."

"What do you offer?"

"For starters, your hospital bill will be mailed to Megan, so you don't need to worry about that. I could loan you some money. But if you want, you can have a job and a place to stay.

"What kind of a job?"

"Willie's old job."

"Taking care of your place?"

"I know. I cannot pay you much. But you get a place to stay. And it is not that much work. I'm not messy. It would give you time to adjust to all the changes. I know how tough that can be."

"What would you know about it?

* * *

Nicholas fudged with his miniature stage. This thing should work. If it had worked for Petofi, it should work for him.

Of course, it wasn't precisely Petofi's stage. But it was built on the same principle, with the same materials.

More or less. Damn it! Getting money out of that Hawkes bitch was as easy as pulling teeth!"

But she always wanted to see results. She wanted the maximum return for the minimum investment. That philosophy did not work with business. It didn't work with magic, either.

It was a good thing that Edison did not have to work under people who threatened to cut off the funding when he didn't get results on the first try.

Just as if on cue, Carolyn came in waving a sheaf of bills.

"You expect me to pay for these, too?"

"It would help if you did." Nicholas smiled, turning his face away. He'd just have to put up with Carolyn's explosion if he was every going to get the money.

"And what do you have to show for all this spending?"

"I...I am working on something."

"Ah, you are not working on nothing. Good to know. What are you working on? Wondering what other bills to stick me with?"

"I am trying to build a mini-stage..."

"I don't pay you to go into show business!"

Nicholas winced. The ignorance of the woman!

"This mini-stage will allow me to spy on Barnabas as you asked me."

"What's wrong with binoculars?"

"This mini-stage can do much more. It can look through walls. It can show the past and the future. It can show what a person is thinking.

"It can do all that?" This time there was a bit of awe in Carolyn's voice.

"It should."

"It should, but doesn't?" she was sarcastic again "have you tried it?"

"Not yet...I was going to."

"Well, start it. And it'd better work."

Smiling hurt Nicholas inside. The things he had to put up with just to get his bare essentials...

"Show me my cousin."

First it was dark inside the stage. Then a hazy light came through. Then a succession of chaotic images that wouldn't stay put long enough to be identified.

"Your glorified TV set has problems with the reception."

"Be patient " Nicholas repressed and expletive "here it is, forming at the center."

The face of Barnabas appeared at the center. Pale, immobile, with his eyes closed.

"Yes" Carolyn acknowledged. "It is him. Since it is daytime, it is all he can do."

"He's dreaming" Nicholas pointed to the chaotic images. "And this is what he is dreaming about."

"Very impressive." Carolyn admitted grudgingly.

"Thank you."

"Use it tonight."

"Er...there is a problem."

"A problem?"

"It doesn't' work very well in nighttime."

Carolyn let out a long stream of expletives.

"You mean that you sunk my money into a TV set that will not work when I need it most?"

"I...I think that I can correct it."

"By tonight?"

Nicholas made a face, not trusting himself to give the right answer.

"You, R. and D. fellows are all the same. You are all trying to get the Nobel Prize on company time. Well, forget it. I don't want a TV set. I want to know what Barnabas is doing."

"But this..." Nicholas put his hand defensively over the state.

"You can still look through a keyhole, don't you?"

"You don't understand."

You _dare _to tell me that I don't understand?" Carolyn picked up a heavy paperweight and faced the stage. "If you don't do as I say I will smash it."

"No!" Nicholas cried. "Please, don't"

"You do as you are told and I let you have your toy. You can tinker with it in your spare time. But don't expect me to pay for it anymore."

* * *

Maggie was impatient. Wouldn't Megan ever show up? She had been waiting weeks. She could have been killed by now, for all that Megan cared...

She put on the TV and air conditioner. Between the two, they would cover the sound of the conversation if there were bugs. To be on the safe side she would also use the hair dryer...

As she came out of the bathroom with the hair dryer she saw the package addressed to Barnabas. It was funny. She had packed the music box and addressed it. But she had forgotten to mail it. And later, she had slept soundly with no nightmares. It seemed that the intention was as good as the deed for these things.

There was a rustling of the curtains, and Megan was sitting on the sofa.

Maggie turned on the hair dryer "Why didn't you come immediately? she asked.

"You are not my only client. I had some important business to take care of.

"Didn't I write you that my business was urgent?"

"But it wasn't"

"It was."

"If it was urgent, you'd have phoned, not trusted the US Post Office. As you did when Barnabas came to DC. Evidently what you wanted could wait for postal delivery, and for me to pick up my mail.

"If I say it is urgent, it is urgent."

"I remember the last 'urgent' job I did for you. That guy who looked like Barnabas. You were sure he was after you. The way you had me handle the job nearly got him too interested in you. What is it this time?"

"Joe Haskell."

"Your old boyfriend?"

"He's after me. He wrote me a card. That's a way of threatening me. Of saying that he will use all he knows about me and Barnabas..."

"There you are, Paranoid again. Good thing I did not come. After I finished handling Haskell the way you wanted, he'd possibly have one or two ideas he wouldn't have thought of on his own."

"I want you to send him to Wyndcliff again."

"That's not funny"

"It would be the same thing that sent him there in the first place. You do that anyway."

"No" Megan rose angrily " I don't do that kind of work. I don't send people to the cuckoo's nest."

"What about Frank Torrance?"

"It was different, and you know it."

If Josette had been anything like Maggie, Barnabas was lucky he did not marry her. To think that Maggie had once loved Joe the way she loved Phillip..."

"So you won't do it?"

"No. I advise you to do something about your paranoia."

"So you think it is only that?"

"DC is the perfect place to catch it. And the fact that the first one you suspected looked like Barnabas...I'm no psychologist, but I think that I can see a pattern.

"Maybe you are right." How many times she had told herself the same thing. It was that. Joe. The man who looked like Barnabas...anything that reminded her of 1967...

She decided to stop making an ass of herself in front of Megan.

"There is something else.

"What is it?"

"I think I can do something about the unemployment problem"

"About time you worried about that."

"I am in contact with this man. Xavier Davenport. He thinks that he can put up a small business center powered by a local waterfall.

"Well, that could work. We have several waterfalls in the area. What businesses does he have in mind?"

"Greenhouses. Mushroom raising. A small show factory. Sweaters..."

"Barnabas would be delighted to hear that."

"Will you go tell him of Davenport?"

"Why don't you go?"

"Because...because it would be inconvenient" Suddenly Maggie became very aware of the box behind her."

"Why?"

"Because people would find out..."

"Find out that you are tackling a local problem?"

"But Barnabas..."

"Barnabas is one of many constituents you are doing this for. You go see your own people, your base, to take care of their concerns. Invite the newspapers and have photos taken of the trip. And use those later for your reelection campaign_."_


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

George handed the nurse a cup of coffee.

"Don't rush. Take your time." he advised her.

She had something to tell him. Something that had been eating her inside for a long time. And now she was afraid of saying it.

"I appreciate your coming forward like this."

"If the hospital knew that I have come I could be fired" she shivered "but I have to tell somebody."

"Don't worry. They won't find out that it was you who blew the whistle. I will conduct my own investigation and mention only that I got ways to get information."

"You swear you'll say nothing about me?" her knuckles were white as she gripped her cup of coffee.

"Word of honor" George held up a hand.

The nurse sniffled, then spoke. "It is about Mr. Jennings. He came in to visit his wife. A couple of weeks ago. They had this big fight. And when I went into the room, he turned into a wolf.

"You had never seen him do that before?" George asked mildly, with understanding.

"No" she shook "It was...so sudden. And if I hadn't had my silver ring he would have killed Mrs. Jennings and me."

"Your silver ring?"

"Here" she took it off her finger and gave it to George.

"You hit him with this?" George studied the ring, trying to hide his surprise.

"No. Mrs. Jennings did. And...and when he changed back, she said that the wolf was out of control."

"She said that?" George's expression suddenly scared the nurse.

"You think I am just imagining it" she wailed.

"I don't" he tried to reassure her. "This is the wrong town to accuse anyone of imagining things. No, it is just that you bring me bad news. Not that I am not grateful to you "he added quickly "it is just that I am worrying about what I am going to do with the problem. Continue. What happened after Mrs. Jennings told Mr. Jennings that he had reverted?"

"She said that she had misspoke because she was angry. And that if we mentioned it outside, she would sue us."

That was smart of Sabrina, because Chris had not reverted at all. No way that he would have been controlled otherwise by Avon silvertone jewelry, since that was what the nurse's ring was.

"But I have to tell it to someone. He believes it, and he looks like he might...slip again..."

...So Sabrina had found another weapon in her skirmishes with Chris.

"Now, to be sure, can you repeat what went on, step by step?"

* * *

Maggie shifted the addressed package from one hand to the other. Should she mail it or not? That way she would be rid of her nightmares. For a while, at least.

But if she went to Collinsport now she couldn't sent the box ahead of her. That wouldn't help her in dealing with Barnabas.

But to see Barnabas' face when he received it...

* * *

Frank Torrance had been a good friend, Barnabas thought. The way he had reorganized the paperwork he could now handle it. And he had left being books like "The Peter Principle" and "Murphy's Laws" that allowed him to find humor in his predicament.

One of these days, he would be a competent paper shuffler.

Megan had been a good friend too. Carolyn had started hiring again, which gave him a lot more breathing space.

Now if Julia finally came and he could get David off the hospital before they fried his brain with drugs...

He sighed. If there was something he could do for David now...

Louella seemed to have stabilized, as he could gather from Derek's reports. She wasn't going anywhere near Widow's Hill and was acting normal, even if somewhat lonely..

Now, if he could stop Willie from having anxiety attacks in his office...Evidently waiting patiently was too much to ask of Willie. he wanted action and he wanted it _now_. That he might be playing the bull in the China shop was of no concern for him.

He could understand Willie. He had felt that way himself many times. But too many errors taught him otherwise. When he thought of the way that he had consistently done the wrong tithing in 1897...Like when he had killed Carl Collins. Moral considerations aside, he had lost all his bargaining power when he did it...

"Hey! he was supposed to be working, not reminiscing about the bad old days! No wonder that his work accumulated.!

The sheriff entered his office as he prepared to attack his workload with renewed vigor.

"What is it, George? Business or just a social call?"

"Semi-official business"

"I see" Barnabas straightened in his chair. " who is in trouble this time?"

"Chris Jennings."

"Chris? The last time I saw him he was doing all right. He was going to start a worm farm.

"A worm farm?"

"Yes. He asked me to invest in it. And I have been wondering if I should."

"A worm farm! So he's fallen for that scam!"

"Scam?"

"And you nearly put money in it" George gave a half-smile "you almost invested in a fly-by-night operation."

"Is that a pun? I never heard it before" Barnabas smiled in spite of himself.

"You don't mind."

"It is better than then usual IRS jokes. But tell me how the scam works."

"Well, you get the worms with the instructions. You seem to be doing OK. But when the time comes to sell them, you find there is no market. All you are left with is a lot of worms.

"Poor Chris! He waned that farm so much.

"And he's supposed to be a detective. But then he's just the fifth wheel in that outfit" George's own opinion of Chris was no secret to anyone.

"I see what you mean by Chris being in trouble."

"No." George sobered, forgetting his amusement at Chris' business venture. "it is more serious than that."

"What is it?"

"Look, this is confidential. I got it from a good source that Chris and Sabrina fought. I know, they do it all the time. But this time Chris went on all fours to settle the problem.

Barnabas gasped.

"Sabrina hit him with a silver ring. and later she told him that he had reverted.

"He did?

"I know he didn't I saw the ring Sabrina used. Costume jewelry."

"So it seems there is no danger."

"Wait. There is. Sabrina did not tell him that the ring was costume jewelry. She let him go on thinking that he had reverted. He may still believe that."

"I see."

"And Sabrina knew it from the start. Before she hit Chris with the ring, she told him that it _was _a silver ring.. She knew that that kind of psychological ploy would only work if Chris was in control of the wolf. She knew the ring was fake, but let him believe it was real silver. She let him believe that he was reverting. And I think that she still lest him believe that."

"He tried to kill her and she's driving him crazy."

"A recipe for disaster. It is a fifth-fifty chance now whether he kills her or himself."

"I think I better have a take with Chris "Barnabas rose from his chair. "Now."

"Just don't tell him that I sent you. Since I've been questioning Amy about her drug contacts he's taken a dislike to me... You know that I was just doing my job" he added defensively


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Amy was worrying about Chris. He was so distant...he looked so unhappy. When they had come back from the hospital they had made plans. They had been happy. What had happened since to make him brood so?

Was it something she had done?

If only there was someone else around...If Sabrina came back from the hospital. If the sheriff at least dropped in...

She had resented his interrogations. But now that they were over, she missed having someone to talk to. George Brant knew how to listen. Maybe it was only to get more information out of her, but he paid attention to her, nevertheless.

When Barnabas knocked at her door the joy of having company was greater than either the memory of her fear the night he had attacked her, or her shame for the way she had treated him. She hung herself from his neck.

"Careful with that shoulder" Barnabas begged her. "It hurts."

She just hung there until he led her away from the door and made her sit on the sofa.

"I see that you are doing better."

"Yes, I am" she acknowledged with a sad smile "I'm still clean."

The _still _alarmed Barnabas. It would take very little for her to start shooting up again.

"What's the problem?"

"Problem?" She started to deny, but couldn't. "It's Chris. He stands there, not saying a word. I think he's mad at me. I think that he is sorry I moved back with him."

"No, Amy, it couldn't be that." He put his arm around her shoulders as she was beginning to sob.

"And if he does I deserve it. Why would anyone want me?"

"Amy, whatever problem he has, it has nothing to do with you."

"How can you know?"

"Believe me, I know it."

Amy sniffled, not sure whether to believe Barnabas or not

"You still reading the cards?" he asked, hoping that a change of conversation would cheer her up.

"No, not lately."

"Would you read them for me?"

There was a flicker of interest in her eyes. Then it disappeared.

"I am not very good at it...I was only playing with them." She seemed to revel on any proof of her own unworthiness.

"But you once read danger from crowds to me. And not long after Carolyn exposed me."

"That was a fluke and you know it. Sure, I can get the right cards But it is in interpreting them that I am weak. Interpretation is what matters."

"Well, practice makes perfect. Bring your deck and read it."

"You really think I can do a good job?"

"You only need to work at it."

This time the flicker of interest in Amy's eyes did not disappear. She brought her deck and laid out a ten card spread.

"Well, what do you think?" Barnabas asked.

"I...I don't know...You got too many powerful cards. Four Major Arcana cards: The High Priestess, the Empress, the Moon, and the Hanged Man. Two aces. The ace of Swords and the ace of Coins. Two Queens. Again Swords and Coins. the Knight of Cups. and only one "pip" card: the two of swords.

"And you think?"

"There may be very serious trouble ahead. Two of swords means strife. And Swords and Coins. Strife between political and economic power."

"Maggie and Carolyn? You think it might be connected to the factory I am trying to bring?"

"Might be. Only one cup. Cups symbolize love. But it is not enough in the face of the strife. There is only one of them, and lower in rank than the Queens. You got too many female cards, and too little male."

"Trouble with women?"

"The Major Arcana are female three to one. The Empress, the High Priestess, and the Moon. The only male is the Hanged Man. Even the best interpretation, the Initiate, makes it lower in rank than the High Priestess.."

"What do you make of it?" Suddenly Barnabas was interested. What had started as an intent to cheer Amy had turned into serious business.

"I...I'm not sure. You should ask Angelique...she'd know."

"Could she be the High Priestess?"

Amy said nothing and stared at the spread.

Barnabas diagrammed the spread on paper. "Here. Keep it and study it. If you come up with any idea about it, le me know. I will keep a copy, too."

Chris came into the house before they had finished putting the cards away.

"You believe in that?" Chris asked Barnabas, more to make conversation that out of real conviction..

"I have come to believe worse things."

"Maybe you are right." Chris said, without much interest..

Barnabas noticed how accurate Amy had been about Chris.

"Why are you here? Did you come just to have your cards read?"

"No. It is something else."

"So Iris told you." he said bitterly.

"Iris? What has she to do with this?"

"Don't play games with me."

"I had to tell you about the worms."

"What about them? You want to invest now?" there was a lack of interest in Chris' words.

"I come to warn you not to buy them. If you do, you'll find yourself without any buyers afterwards."

"You mean...it is a con game?"

"That's what I was told."

"Great! Real great!" Chris said with grim humor. "It seems that there isn't' a single thing I can do right. I mean, when I screw up, I screw up in style. Wonderful!"

"Chris..."

"What a huge joke my life has been! You remember when we met at the hospital? I was going to start making an honest living. I was going to patch up my marriage. So what do I do? I sink my money in a worm scam and I try to tear Sabrina's throat off."

Amy gave out a small strangled cry at those words.

Barnabas turned to her "you'd better leave" he told her.

"But..."

"I have a feeling that he will take it easier if you are not around."

Amy left the room.

"What happened?'

"You wouldn't understand."

"Yes, I would." Barnabas said quietly. "In fact, I know better than anyone what you are going through."

Chris shrugged."

"Tell me, Chris. I've felt many times the way you do now. I know what it is like."

"Yes, I guess you would."

"Now, what happened with the wolf?"

"I don't know. It would depend..."

"On what?"

"On what happened just before. Were you fighting?"

Chris's eyes narrowed "Are you sure you didn't talk with Iris?"

"I didn't"

"You came here just for the worm farm?"

"Yes."

"Then why do you sound like her?"

"Maybe because she's right."

"I wish I could believe it." Chris dropped his shoulders. "I know she meant well. I know that all of you meant well.. But following all that advice didn't do much good. I ended up married to a shrew, in a job that I couldn't do. I was told that all I had to do is be a front and enjoy the money. I did it all because I was told it would help control the wolf. And now the wolf is out of control."

"Is it really?" The two of them wren fighting, weren't you?"

"So we were. I even belted her a couple of times."

Barnabas gasped, but then decided that it wasn't the time to lecture Chris on domestic violence.

"And you blame your curse, of course." he couldn't restrain his irony." you could instead blame your poor judgment or your short temper. But a curse is so easy to put the blame on. I might as well blame my own curse for my attacking Amy when you broke my collarbone."

"It is different?"

"Is it? Do you know how many times I did the same thing? Do you know how many times I blamed my curse instead of admitting I had been stupid? And you know the worst? Everyone agreed with me. No one did me the favor of telling me that vampirism is no excuse for stupidity. So now I am going to do you that favor: Lycanthropy is no excuse for stupidity. And no excuse for wife beating."

"Wife beating?

"You hit Sabrina, didn't you?"

"She asked for it."

"That's what all of them say...Think of it. None of those men are cursed. And yet they still beat their wives."

"So what do you think I should do?" this time the defiance was mixed with eagerness "should Sabrina and I separate?"

"It seems the safest thing to do."

"Are you sure you didn't talk to Iris?"


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Joe Haskell forced open the lock in the door of Sam Evans; cottage. There where few people out now, with the cold, so he was fairly sure he was not being observed.

He looked around. The place hadn't changed much since he had seen it last.

He repressed the memories of being led off in a straightjacket. That wasn't what he was looking for.

Maggie kept the cottage closed. She might have it cleaned three or four times a year, but that was all. She refused to rent it, even for the summer. And while she was always speaking of selling her father's paintings, she never actually got around to it.

And those paintings were there now. He had to see them.

Or rather, Sam Evans wanted to see them again. Yes, that was it. Sam Evans wanted to get near his paintings again, and was using him for it.

Either that, or he was having a relapse..

No. He shouldn't think that. He was cured. They had cured him at Wyncliffe, and he meant to remain that way.

The pictures were upstairs, in the small sanctuary that Maggie had built in memory of her father.

There the pictures stacked against the wall, while in the middle of the room stood an easel. Joe wasn't surprised to see tubes of paint and brushes next to the easel.

He looked at the pictures, one by one. He came upon an old portrait of his.

Had he ever looked like that? Young, sure of himself, untouched by grief...

Nowhere in the picture you could see the marks that had come to his face. Nowhere in the picture you could see the old battered boat that he had to depend on for his daily catch. Nor his lonely room. Nor the stares and whispers behind his back of people wondering when he'd go crazy again.

He dropped the picture. He knew that Sam wanted to work on it. but not yet. It hurt him too much to see it.

Instead the took the picture of an old Indian and put it on the easel.

* * *

Maggie packed her bags. When Megan was right, she was right. The Davenport matter was something she had to discuss with Barnabas. Too much hinged on it.

And what about the box? Why had she sent it the day before? So that she could see how Barnabas reacted?

Revenge, that's what she wanted...and for what? In the end, she had profited. She could be now married to Joe, another housewife. Working part-time most likely. Instead she was an U.S. Representative, with a fair prospect of either inheriting Muskie's seat or becoming the first woman Governor of Maine.

So how could she stop the Post Office from delivering that box? Because once Barnabas saw it, all bets were off...

Unless she got there before it.

* * *

"You want a divorce?" Sabrina's tone made Chris feel as if he had just suggested Kamikaze training.

"Just a temporary separation."

"You are tired of me?"

"Barnabas said it was best."

"Who asked him?"

What was there about Sabrina that made conversation with her impossible?

"He came to me..."

"Of course, he volunteered. That's all he knows how to do."

Chris paced nervously. Talking to Barnabas, thinking by himself he had managed to understand things. He was beginning to get a grip on himself. But five minutes with Sabrina, and all his self-possession went out of the window.

"Would you rather get your throat torn out?" he said harshly.

"You really think that getting rid of me will stop you from reverting?"

"It's worth a try." Why was Sabrina so difficult to convince? God! How she got on his nerves!"

"Sure, baby, sure. Next thing you'll tell me is that I am the one that makes it flare up."

Chris wanted to hit her. He controlled himself. He couldn't allow himself to end up like the last time."

"You are impossible!" he screamed at her. "Anything I want, You won't let me have it. It is always been what you wanted.!

"Always?" she mocked him. "Like when you sold my agency behind my back? Like when you had your vasectomy and never told me about it? And I kept worrying why I couldn't get pregnant. If I hadn't looked at your papers, I'd have never found the truth."

"You know why I did id!" An angry haze was forming in front of Chris's eyes.

"You never told me anything!"

Sabrina looked distorted, out of focus. And fragile...

Chris understood what that meant. He backed away from Sabrina. From the temptation to tear at her flesh.

"Running away will not solve anything!" Sabrina's voice taunted him as he went out of the door.

"Do not listen" he told himself "Try to calm down. Breathe slowly."

He was somewhat aware of other people in the corridor. He thought he could recognize Sabrina's nurse, but he couldn't be sure. He tried to keep walking and ignore the rage burning inside him.

"Mr. Jennings" he heard a voice behind him.

"I'm with the accounting department. It seems that there was a slight mistake in your billing."

He let her guide him because to try to resist, to think in any way might bring about the explosion he feared.

"Mr. Jennings! Mr. Jennings! Are you listening to me?"

"Huh?" Chris tried to shut himself off to the buzzing of her voice...the irritating buzzing of her voice.

"Look, I know that I am taking your time. But you are taking mine. I have these records to straighten up and I need your cooperation.

Chris growled Would she ever shut up?

"There is no need to be unpleasant, Mr. Jennings. All I need is a few dates.

Chris rose and violently pushed her away.

"Mr. Jennings!"

He picked up a chair and smashed it over the desk. God, that felt good!

"What are you doing? This is hospital property!"

He turned around and tore her dress. Then, without waiting for her reaction, smashed the other chair.

The woman ran away screaming, while Chris began to demolish the desk.

He toppled one of the filing cabinets, so that it blocked the door. He could hear them outside trying to force their way in. He didn't care. He had discovered the file folders. So much paper! He threw it in the air. That was fun!

When the police finally force the door open, he was sitting quietly in the middle of the room, among the papers, smiling beatifically.

"Tell Barnabas that he was right" he said as the policeman handcuffed him.

* * *

George got an eyeful of Chris' attempts at self-therapy.

"How did it start?"

"I asked Mr. Jennings to help me straighten up some of our records. And he did this."

"I see that they are quite straightened up."

"It is not funny" the woman rose, solemn "all you people are the same when it comes to Administrative Services. You want us to be perfect, all the time. But you won't give out the littlest bit of help, even if is about your own mistakes."

She was wrapped in a robe, still. But she managed to look very much in uniform. George figured out that she had taken special classes to get that knack.

"My apologies, lady. Did he tear off your dress?"

"Yes."

'Did he do...anything else?"

"He didn't try to rape me, if that's what you mean. He just wanted to tear up something."

"How much damage did he do?"

"One desk, one file cabinet, and two chairs. And the records all over the place."

"Records torn?"

"No. Just scattered."

"You have a computer terminal here, I see."

"Yes. We do."

"It wasn't damaged?"

"No. It wasn't"

For a destructive character Mr. Jennings seem to have been quite restrained.

"Restrained! Do you know how long it will take me to straighten all those records again?"

"Considering the kind of damage that can be done in a hospital, I'd say that he was restrained. Anybody hear saw anything?"

Sabrina's nurse stepped forward, hesitatingly.

"Yes, Miss?"

"I...I passed him in the corridor. He looked...I don't know, strange. As if something was happening to him."

"We all know that he's a werewolf." George said. "Did any of you think that he might be...changing?"

A murmur at the back of the assembled people told him that more than one had considered the possibility.

"Did he turn into a wolf when he was with you?"

"No." the administrator said "but..." he voice lowered.

"But?"

"He never spoke. He just grunted and growled...And then he...pushed me...and if he hadn't torn the furniture he might...he might..."

The realization made her faint.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Barnabas had just hung the phone when George barged in.

"What in God's name did you tell Chris?" he yelled, without waiting for a greeting.

"Why? What happened?"

"What happened, he asks. A one man demolition crew, that's what happened. He went to talk to Sabrina. He lost his temper and started smashing furniture. He also tore off the dress of one of the C.P.A.s and scattered all the records he could find."

"He did that?"

"He did. And when my men put the cuffs on him, he said to tell you that you were right. So what did you tell him?"

"Just that it would be better if he and Sabrina kept apart."

"So he went quickly to tell her, instead of keeping away from her."

"I think he wanted to tell her he was leaving her."

"And he lost his temper. He was ready to go on all fours, and he kept himself from doing so by smashing furniture.."

"In a way that's good news. At least he knows that he has control of the wolf."

"I don't care to have that kind of control. A little more of it, and this place will look like as if it had been hit by a nuclear explosion."

"You got a point. He and Sabrina shouldn't be together. You said you arrested him?"

"He's now sitting in jail. He's taking it easy. Seems somehow happy."

"It does not surprise me. He's now got peace of mind about the wolf."

"But I don't have any peace of mind myself.. What are we going to do with him? I think that I can get the hospital to withdraw the complaint. But do I want to?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do I want to get out, so that he can go back to Sabrina, for the next explosion? In jail, he is safe."

"Unless Sabrina decides to visit him." Barnabas considered it. "I got it... Maggie is coming for a couple of days. I'll ask her to hire Sabrina and take her away to DC."

"She mentioned once or twice that she'd like to hire Sabrina if she was willing."

"Not her. Sabrina. Will she want to go?"

"I guess it is up to me to convince her."

"Not up to you. Up to the two of us."

"You are coming with me?"

"Someone ahs to make sure that she does not make you lose your temper, as she made Chris lose his."

"You think that I can't control myself?"

"I saw what you did to Amy."

"That was different."

"Yes. Amy is nowhere as infuriating as Sabrina."

* * *

Joe Haskell studied the painting.

Why had Sam wanted to paint that? Why that old Indian? Why did he have him draw a twig, no, a branch at the bottom of the picture, just below the old man's foot? And why the rope that connected the two?

It didn't make sense. Did Sam actually believe that the picture looked better that way?

Or did it mean something else? If that was so, he couldn't figure out what that cold be.

* * *

"You must be kidding" Sabrina taunted both George and Barnabas.

"No. We want you to consider working for Maggie."

"You want me to divorce Chris, isn't that true?"

"A temporary separation."

"You are the one who put Chris up to it. And when Chris couldn't get anywhere, it's your turn to try. I see that you brought along a new boyfriend. What's the matter? Willie left you?"

White anger burned in George. A sudden rush of sympathy for Chris rushed in.

"Chris is now in jail" he said coldly.

"Is he?"

"I will not release until you leave town. And if you are thinking about getting your share of the agency back, think again. If you try holding on to it, and Chris.. goes to jail, I'll put up the rumor that the real reason was embezzlement and fraud, and that you beat the rap because you were smart enough to destroy the evidence against you. You'll never attract the clients you want that way."

"You wouldn't! You would only hurt Megan that way."

"Megan can take care of herself. You can't, unless you leave for Washington."

"Sabrina," Barnabas spoke gently, trying to ease away the sheriff's brutality. "why do you want to remain here? This place is a boondock. In Washington you could do so many things...why not go?"

"So you are now playing 'good cop, bad cop'? If Washington is such a great place why don't you go there.?"

"I wish I could."

"Look, with the contacts you already have and the ones you can make in Washington, you can open an agency in DC before you know it. This time it will be all yours."

"And Chris?"

"After two years, maybe you too will be able to live together without fighting."

Sabrina's eyes began to show her interest. "You make sure that Maggie hires me?"

"I will ask her."

"And she will pay attention to you, of course. She..." she suddenly changed conversation. "and of course, if I don't go, you'll let me have it."

"This town may be a boondock" George smiled "but it has been good to me and I'd hate to see it demolished just because you and Chris cannot get along."

"I'll think about it."

A few moments later, Barnabas and George were sitting in the waiting room and talking.

"You think she will take it?" George was still worried.

"Yes. Did you notice that she was starting to say something about Maggie, and then changed her mind?"

"Yes. She did."

"Knowing Sabrina, it was probably something nasty. I guess that she realized that saying it might cost her the job."

"You are right." George said. "what she said...about you and me."

"That's Quentin doing. He went around saying that Willie and I..." Barnabas hesitated. "and you got tarred with the same brush."

George breathed deeply, wondering for how long could he keep Barnabas from guessing...and what he would do when he found out...

"Can you do me a favor?" Barnabas asked.

"What is it?"

"David. I don't want them to keep him so drugged. I tried to get them to reduce the dosage, but they wouldn't listen. Maybe I'll have better luck if I throw some official weight around.

* * *

Louella paced. Why didn't Quentin call? Didn't he know how much she worried?

...When Willie went to Washington, he called her every day...

But Willie had betrayed her in the worst way.

Yet Willie called her. He was considerate. Even his carelessness, his failed attempts to stop smoking, his sloppiness had something endearing about them. He was affectionate, even if he was absent minded about it.

Love with Willie wasn't the passionate kind. Not like Quentin. Willie wasn't dashing like Quentin.

But he didn't act as if he had forgotten that she exited...

She walked to the window. Megan was out of town, and Barnabas couldn't fly. She sighed, and not wholly for relief. She was starved for company, and even one of them would do...

No...that was wrong...she should be praying to be rid of those thoughts...she should be reading the Bible.

...But the Bible said that she was an adulteress...

"Double adultery" she heard a voice say "for he is married, too."

Where did she get that idea? Quentin was single...

"Is that the way that you care of a woman entrusted to you? By stealing her husband?"

Where did that voice come from?

"Who are you? Where are you?"

Derek flattened himself against the wall, ready to disappear if she came close.

Louella turned around, clasping the locket in her hand.

"Is anybody there?"

...And she heard laughter.

* * *

There was a package in the mail. Barnabas sighed. Probably it was another of Carolyn's gifts. Somehow she seemed to think that it was funny to give him such gifts as suntan lotion or mirrors. She wondered why she kept at it.

He wondered why he kept opening the packages.

But this one wasn't from Carolyn. It was from Maggie.

Why? Maggie had never sent him anything before. Letters, yes, but not gifts. No objects. Somehow there was an unspoken arrangement with them not to give each other anything.

Why had they decided that? Did it have to do with...with what had happened in1967?

He felt cold...he dreaded thinking of 1967. When he had been crazy and had...What had he done?

He controlled himself. There was no point in raking over old wounds. Probably he hadn't one tenth of the things he imagined he had done. He couldn't have burned Willie alive, for instance, even if he sometimes dreamed about it.

...But what about beating Willie up?...

He shook himself, not allowing himself to thing about it. It does not good. No good at all. he said to himself.

He unwrapped the package quickly , curious to see what it was that Maggie had sent him.

...And Josette's music box stared at him...


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

"I beat you again, little sister" Chris said to Amy.

"Yes. You did" she looked around "but I would like to play checkers without these bars between us."

Chris sighed. "Don't I know it?"

"Won't you let me post bail?"

"No. Save the money. When we get out, we will raise chickens."

"Chris..." she hesitated "when..?"

"As soon as Sabrina leaves for Washington. They are keeping me here for my own protection until then."

"You trust them?"

"I have to."

The door opened and the sheriff come in. "It is getting late. Do you want me to take you home?"

"Sabrina is there. I am not staying with her."

* * *

Maggie stoked the fire. Why had she come in this cold to an unheated house? All that kept her from freezing was the way she bundled up and the coffee she kept drinking.

...She wasn't going to look much like Josette when Barnabas showed up...

And she wanted very much to. All her ideas about outrunning the package had been just a way to hide from herself what she really wanted.

She wanted revenge for the way that Barnabas had treated her. She had cheated herself too long of it, using lame excuses: he was politically useful. In 1967 he was not responsible for his actions...

...He made my father believe that I was dead. He shut me in that coffin. He taunted me saying that nobody believed that there was a Maggie Evans anymore...

Tonight, she'd make him pay..

* * *

Barnabas tried to steady himself. He had to see Maggie tonight. He owed it to Chris.

Maggie...her eyes wide with terror...Josette running towards Widow's Hill...Willie whimpering in the ground.

What had he done in 1967? What had he done?

...Maggie...Josette...Willie...Julia...Vicky...Burke...

He tried not to look at the half-open package still on the table. He should have put it away, where he couldn't see it. But he was afraid to touch it.

...Maggie...the way Maggie looked...Maggie running away from him...Maggie in Wyncliffe...

What had he done to her?

He had to meet her tonight. For Chris' sake.

...Willie, on the ground...whimpering...trying to evade the next blow...

No! he couldn't have done that...

He was now looking at his clothes. Trying to decide what to wear to the meeting. Trying to keep his mind from working.

He rummaged, trying to keep his mind focused on clothes. He's better wear a different jacket, and a better looking tie.

His hand touched fabric. Soft fabric...

Fabric of a woman's dress...

* * *

Louella tossed in bed, unable to sleep. Her fingers held fast the chain of Beth's locket.

Derek could see the perspiration on her forehead and the way she was biting her lips. The air around her was charged. Something would happen there soon. And he didn't know if he would be able to handle it.

He could keep her away from Widow's Hill. Is she tried to take too many sleeping pills now, he would be able to stop her...But if one day she stayed inside in the daytime and...had an accident... a sleeping knife. Sleeping pills in the middle of the afternoon with some booze to help them down.

And what could he do then? What could anyone? He had grown fond of Louella. Even if he wasn't, he didn't want to end with a corpse in his hands.

* * *

Maggie cursed the cold. Bundled up as she was, how could she convince Barnabas that she was Josette?

She had played the scene so many times in her mind...and to have it go wrong now...

She saw the headlights coming up the road. So he had decided to drive instead of flying. Was that his way of being considerate or what?

He knocked at the door.

"Not like old times" she thought "not like when you came through the window as a dirty, mangy bat.."

She opened the door to him.

* * *

Joe Haskell crouched outside Maggie's house, waiting for a chance to slip in again. There was so much more painting to do...

He saw Barnabas drive up to the cottage, get out, and be let in by Maggie.

"I wish I could fix you. I wish I could fix you good."

He could let the air out of his tires, at least. It didn't pay him back for all he endured, but...

He took his penknife and knelt by the car.

"No. Don't do it" Sam's voice said.

"Why not? Why shouldn't I?

He had heard Sam's voice hadn't he? He wasn't just talking to himself?

"Because you can't start painting until he leaves. And we have a lot of painting to do tonight."

* * *

"You can't stay here in this cold." he said trying to steady himself.

"Why? You want me to go with you to the Old House?" she emphasized the last words and watched him react.

...Maggie with him at the Old House...

He tried not to hear, not to see Maggie moving around the room. Maggie moving like...like she was Josette...

...She had screamed defiance at him...

"Anything wrong?" she asked straightening up. She was Maggie again...

"I...I don't know."

She moved towards the fireplace and stoked the fire. "I want to stay here. This is my house. that's where my father, Sam Evans, lived and painted. I am his daughter."

...I am Maggie Evans! See, now you call me Maggie!...

Barnabas shook, hugging himself.

"You are cold" she said. "Sit down by the fire."

He let her lead him. What had he done in 1967? What was with the dress and the music box?

"Maybe you are right. Maybe I should go to the Old House with you."

Barnabas nodded and looked down.

"I haven't seen the Old House in a long time. Have you changed much of it? Have you put the cellar to some use or is it still the same? And you have all of your pictures? Even that woman that resembles me so much?

Barnabas rose and walked towards her.

So she finally had him where she wanted him! She gave it another shot.

"Just make sure you don't forget your cane when we leave."

He walked towards her, not seeing. He felt his lips curl up without his wishing it. He grabbed Maggie by the arms.

"Hey! What are you doing?"

His eyes burned as he pulled her to him "Jossette" he said. "Josette..."

Maggie screamed.

* * *

Nicholas Blair looked at his stage. This thing better work now. If it didn't Carolyn would probably junk it first thing in the morning.

"I think that I finally corrected the night vision."

He sat in front of it, waiting for the figures to form.

* * *

Maggie tried to fight Barnabas off, knowing it was useless. Knowing from her own experience he could not be stopped.

"But this is not how it was supposed to happen!" she thought while his fangs came closer to her throat.

The phone was ringing.

"The phone" she said. "we have to answer it."

As a ploy, it was stupid. Yet, something in him wanted to pull out of that situation. And a ringing telephone was good enough as an excuse.

"Barnabas, are you there, at Maggie? Amy asked.

"Yes it's me, Amy. What is it?" he tried to organize his thoughts, to forget what had almost happened...

"Have you talked to her about Sabrina?"

"Sabrina? He tried to remember what Sabrina had to do with the whole thing.

"What's the matter with you? What are you two doing? Going down memory lane while Chris rots in jail?"

'Going down memory lane while Chris rots in jail' That was funny...real funny.

"Are you laughing? What's so funny? You think that Chris going to jail is funny?"

"Amy, no...don't hang up.." Barnabas said between giggles. "I am not laughing at you...I...I just made a fool out of myself...and...and it would have been worse if you hadn't called. I will talk to her about Sabrina.

He hung up and turned to Maggie.

"I think that you better go to the hotel, where it is warm. I'll drive you there and we'll talk business on the way."


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Slowly the figures formed themselves in the little stage.

It was working! Nicholas almost jumped. At last he could show Carolyn what her money was paying for.

He'd better call her now.

* * *

"Do you think that Ted Kennedy will want to be a candidate?"

"Ted Kennedy was born to be a candidate." Maggie said.

She drove her fist into her palm. As long as they kept talking politics, she was safe.

What kind of a fool was she? Did she actually expect real life to behave like one of her fantasies? She had gotten to Barnabas all right. And he had reacted just as in 1967.

Did she expect otherwise?

Barnabas stared ahead, forcing himself to pay attention to the road.

Amy was right. Whatever happened in 1967 was not reason to forget that Chris was in trouble _now_.

...If only Maggie didn't look so much like Josette...

He was grateful for the darkness inside the car that prevented his seeing her face. He was grateful for her voice, for the things he was saying, so unlike Josette...

"Carter expects us to be kamikazes" she was saying "he expects us to vote for his programs only because they are morally right."

"What's wrong with that?"

"We run for reelection every two years. And he offers us nothing in exchange for jeopardizing our careers. No, I know what you are going to say. We are supposed to stand up for our convictions. But he expects us to do that for _his_ convictions... Eventually a time comes when you have to decide whether to take a stand and go down in honor, or compromise and try to put through a project of your own that might be more important and that might not get off the ground if you aren't there to push it."

"And what happens when you sacrifice that project for something that you think is more important? And at what point being reelected becomes the most important thing?

"I know what you mean. There are people like that. I meet them every day. And I hope I'll never end up that way. Shrunken ethics is an occupational risk. Even so, you have to learn to compromise. I don't think that Hubert Humphrey would have accomplished so much if he hadn't learned to compromise."

"I saw Humphrey's funeral on TV. I saw you, standing close to Muskie."

'You did? He was a great man. We didn't know it then. We were stupid enough to say that there was no difference between him and Nixon."

"We have been punished enough for that."

Maggie was about to pick up a cigarette when she remembered with whom she was riding. Relief filled her. She had been a real fool. Had it not been for Amy's phone call, she'd have paid for it.

After that, she would give Amy what she wanted. She would hire Sabrina away from Collinsport.

Come to think of it, Sabrina could be a real asset to the staff. And that girl...the one that was chafing from routine chores, she could be put to assist Sabrina and learn about security and damage control...

The lights of the hotel came in front of them. Soon they would be warm inside. Soon they would see each other again.

...Soon she might start imitating Josette...

* * *

"So it is working?" Carolyn studied the small stage where Barnabas and Maggie were now entering the hotel.

"As you see. Him and Representative Evans."

"Maggie. A servant in this house."

* * *

She didn't want to imitate Josette. She didn't want to drive him over the edge again.

But she couldn't stop herself. No sooner had the light shone on their faces that she had extended her hand to him. Limply, as Josette might have done.

When they had come in and she had shed off her bulky clothing she stepped gracefully in front of him. And she turned around as if she was swirling a long skirt,, not wearing pants...

"This is a very elegant place." she had said "makes me feel I am in another century?

He stared at her trying to shake off those words. He found himself shivering, trying to hold back the madness that might capture him again...

Somebody pulled at his sleeve.

It was Elsa, the owners' daughter. She was a bright ten-year-old who surveyed the scene as if she didn't think that the business could run well without her supervision.

"What do you want?" he bent towards her.

"Are you going in?"

"Yes."

"Be careful where you stand. We got a floor length mirror. And there are several out-of-towners. Make sure you don't scare them away."

"Or you'll see me in court." Barnabas smiled "All right, I'll be _extremely _careful."

* * *

"Do you think that we can take photos of him now?"

"I don't know how we are fixed for the light" Might need special equipment...

"I have it. Go set it up."

* * *

"So that man, Davenport, thinks that we can power it with a small waterfall."

"Yes. And I think we should go along. After all, it's about time that we put to use the State's hydroelectric potential. It is clean energy and we already have the technology."

As long as they kept speaking...as long as he was more interested in what she said than in how she moved, as long as he didn't notice the way the couldn't help behave...

"We have two waterfalls in the place. One is on Carolyn's land, so we might as well forget about it."

"And the second?"

"In the Indian reservation."

Maggie would have let out a whistle but didn't. Josette would never do it...

"And now the Indians are trying to get their lands back."

"It is going to be a problem." Barnabas acknowledged.

"This business with the Indians is putting a strain in many people's liberal principles."

"It is much easier to be liberal with somebody else's problems. Historically, whatever the benefits of liberalism were, the Indians weren't included in them. In the old days..."

...In the old days... a crying, screaming woman...looking at him...

...Maggie?...Maggie?...

...No, not Maggie. An Indian woman's face...

He shook what was the matter with him? Why did he keep churning the past? Why couldn't he look at Maggie and see Maggie?

Maggie saw him pull back, shivering.

."He...He's noticing what I am doing.

She put her hand on his forehead, gently, lovingly.

"Josette" he murmured.

Maggie pulled her hand back. She tried to keep her arms next to her body, not to move in any way.

"Are you afraid of me, Josette? You must not."

She should scream, run away, anything. Instead, she smiled at him.

"I am not afraid."

"Say, are you Representative Evans?"

Maggie turned, automatically giving to whoever was speaking her best vote-getting smile.

"My name is Robert Gray. These are my wife an kids."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Gray."

"Josette?" Barnabas asked again. He again.

Josette was kissing babies, charming a couple she knew nothing about, just because they might mean a couple more votes next election.

"She's not Josette. She's LBJ."

* * *

"So he's got somebody who'll put up another industry in town, after all." Carolyn said bitingly.

"Do you want to so something about it?"

"Just take photos of him."

"What good would that do?"

"Get photos of him when he's feeding. I think we will get them soon tonight. He looks rather hungry. Then we'll give him the choice of forgetting the whole thing, or waiting until Davenport sees the photos."

* * *

Barnabas stood next to the door that Maggie had just closed. She was going to sleep. Put on her nightgown and lie on her bed.

And her throat would be bare.

...As it had been in 1967...

He pulled himself away. No, he couldn't stay...He couldn't do it again...

But what had he done the first time?

Why did Maggie have to look so much like Josette? And why the music box?

If he went and pressed his lips to Maggie's throat, would he find answers there?

And if he found them, could he escape them?

There was an ache inside him, a tearing. He was lost and in pain. Oh God! He hadn't hurt like this since...since...

Since 1967.

He went down the stairs to the lobby, not daring to look at the closed door behind him. There was music coming from somewhere. He listened to it.

"My life seems unreal/ my crime an illusion/ a scene badly written/ in which I must play."

That old Simon and Garfunkel song...

Then came the long wail "...Somewhere, they can't find me."

He was now singing, and keeping the beat with his fingers.

Memories of listening to that song came to him. Alone, roaming at night, full of pain he couldn't understand, he had listened to it, and to others.

"Blessed are the meth drinkers, pot sellers, illusion dwellers/ Oh, Lord, why have you forsaken me."

And he had wondered how could Simon and Garfunkel know so much about him and his pain.

"Impaled on my wall/my eyes can dimly see/the pattern of my life/and the puzzle that is me."

"Like a rat in a maze/the path before me lies/and the pattern never alters/until the rat dies."

"So my fantasy/becomes reality/and I be what I must be/and face tomorrow."

Oh, God, how he needed those songs...how he needed the peace that came through them...

Elsa shook his arm.

"Try to make less noise."

He looked at her. He felt somewhat lighter now. More capable of appreciating that impish child.

"You are right, kid" she smiled at her.

Somehow Elsa made him think of Sara...And... Did Sarah appear to him back then?.. anyway Elsa had been born in 1969, and he was sure that Sara was not there then...

"Do you plan to go into show business?" she asked him innocently.

"No. You think I should?"

"In the Gong Show, yes."

Barnabas could not help laughing. Elsa always managed to do that. But she needed a warning all the same.

He put a knuckle under her chin and made her look up.

"Nobody likes a precocious child."

* * *

Maggie was shaking, wondering when Barnabas would break in.

He was too shaken to resist the temptation now. And when he came in...

When he came in there would be no phone calls from Amy. Elsa would not come interrupt. No Robert Gray and family to pull her back to reality, either...

Once he came in, neither of them would be able to stop playing. the game. They would both want to be free of it, but they wouldn't be able to do anything about it.

She had sneered when Willie had hinted that Barnabas hadn't been able to stop himself in 1967. That he had been driven. She didn't believe that anybody could be driven that way.

And now, she was as much driven as he had been.

Why did she send the box a few days ahead of her? Why did she give herself such bad excuses to keep at her crazy game? Why hadn't she thought what might happen if Barnabas was pushed too far?

And now, why didn't she take the cross from her bag and hang it around her neck?

He might not come...

Not come? You want him to come, Maggie baby, and you got this crazy idea that you'll remain in control of the situation.

...Maybe I'll get rid of the dreams...and after all, it is a matter of principle.

Principle? Didn't you listen to yourself in the car? "Eventually a time comes when you have to choose between standing for what you believe and going down in glory, or compromising to save an important project which without you wouldn't get off the ground."

What would happen to her plans for hydroelectric energy in Maine if Barnabas pulled her back into being Josette again?

Quickly she slipped the cross over her head.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

"We cannot keep this thing working too long. It's only a first try and it is a little weak."

"You mean it could blow a fuse?"

"Something like that" Nicholas sighed "Anyway, I don't think he's going to feed tonight."

"With that kind of look on his face, he will."

* * *

Branabas drove back, trying to forget Maggie behind the locked door. Maggie swirling around an imaginary long skirt. Maggie's hand resting on his forehead.

He could think instead of Xavier Davenport and what he might mean to the town. He could think about Elsa. He could think how Maggie had looked hustling votes from the Grays...

Politics meant life itself to Maggie. Without the wheeling and dealing, without the crowds around her, she might wilt.

As LBJ had died, deprived of the power that had sustained him for so long. As Hubert Humphrey had been kept alive by the crowd after his body was three quarters dead, and had not allowed himself to die until he was on vacation...

And Maggie was of the same breed.

But why did he keep seeing her as Josette? And why has she looked so much like Josette when the two were in the lobby?

He saw again the locked door.

"Keep driving ahead" he told himself "If you can make it through this night, you'll be all right."

He was now near Maggie's house.

"She left a light on. I better go and put it out."

His shoulder was healed enough, so he could slip through a crevice.

"That crevice shouldn't be there. With good insulation, this house could save a lot of energy."

The light was upstairs. It came from the room where Maggie kept her father's things.

Joe heard steps coming up and he crouched behind a bunch of canvases.

Barnabas stared at the easel in the middle of the room. That portrait of Joe Haskell...when had he seen it last? And what was it doing in the easel? Had Maggie put it there?

He moved closer to it. He could read the signature, Sam Evans, and the date, 1967.

There were oil tubes in front of the picture, strewn around, as Sam used to do...And a smell of fresh paint..

"Sam? Sam?" he asked.

There was something in Joe's portrait, in the upper left corner. It looked like...like a cup.

...The Knight of Cups in Amy's spread.

"Sam!" he called again. "What are you trying to tell me?"

He could feel Sam's presence in the room. Just as it had in...

No. He must not think of 1967.

He studied the cup. Fresh paint, and left handed strokes...

Joe, crouched, wondered when Barnabas would leave. And he wondered why him and Sam considered that cup to be so important...

Barnabas moved near the window to look at the canvases stacked there...Maybe he could find more...

He brushed past the curtain. He held it absentmindedly. And his fingers told him that it was a soft material

...Josette's dress!...

With a scream, Barnabas was gone, driving away. Joe got up from his crouch and saw the car leave.

"Nice to see you again. Nice to know you are doing so well."

* * *

"Isn't that Joe Haskell?" Nicholas pointed at him.

"Yes. The same one. Wonder what he's doing there..

"Maybe having a relapse.."

"He does not seem to like Barnabas. We may be able to use him.

* * *

...Josette...Maggie...Josette's dress...Maggie in Josette's dress...the music box...Maggie lying in her bed, her throat bare...

"If I can make it through this night...just this night."

Maybe if he worked at his office, he might be able to get those thoughts out of his mind...

He went up the stairs, trying not to think how easy it would be to go to Maggie...so close...so tantalizingly close...

Iris, waiting for him in his office, saw him coming. She saw the expression in his face and understood. She had to gamble that he was not so much out of control as when he attacked Amy. She closed her eyes and tilted her head back.

He saw her, a small figure standing by the door. He didn't recognize her. All he could sense was that she was...available.

He moved towards her as if pulled by invisible strings. He took her in his arms and buried his teeth in her neck.

* * *

"Didn't I tell you we'd get the picture? Look at him! Just look at him!

As Nicholas snapped the camera, Carolyn stared fascinated at Barnabas and Iris.

So that's what it looks like...

* * *

Iris tried to calm down Barnabas.

"It is all right" she repeated "it is all right."

"Did I...hurt you?" Barnabas had difficulty speaking "I didn't...take too much?'

"Not a chance. You got your body so well trained that it knows when to stop, even if your mind doesn't."

"I...I didn't even recognize you."

"I know. You looked as if you had been run over by a steamroller."

Barnabas nodded "In a way, I was."

"Want to talk about it?"

He sighed. It had to come out sooner or later. "It's about Maggie"

"What about her?"

"You know what happened to her in 1967?"

"She was kidnapped. When she reappeared, she was insane...Were you the one?"

"I...I don't know. It seems I was, but I don't remember. All that Willie tells me was that I was crazy then... Yes, it was me...I keep getting snatches here and there...and I don't like what I see... And I am afraid that it will happen all over again..'

"But why should it happen all over?"

"Do you know how close I came tonight?"

"You came close, but you didn't"

"If Amy hadn't called on the phone I'd..."

"You mean you interrupted what you were doing to pick up the phone?

"Yes."

"If you'd really have gone over the edge you'd have let it ring until Kingdom Come. I don't think that you are crazy anymore. Being locked up in that coffin might have fried your brains, but you are all right now. Tell me, when you were in Parallel Time, were you locked up again?"

"Yes."

"What did you do when you came out?"

"There was a Maggie there, too. I ...I almost went after her."

"Almost? What stopped you?"

"She told me her problems, and I thought that something should be done about them."

"So you volunteered."

"Somebody had to do it."

'You see? You had already figured out the trick of seizing upon interruptions to keep your from doing what you knew was wrong.'

"Maybe" Barnabas considered the idea.

"You were locked up in a coffin again, but you did not go crazy. If that did not do the trick, nothing will.'

"Maybe" he was more hopeful now "Will. Will Loomis" he added.

"What about him?"

"I beat him up badly once. In a way, I had some right, since he was the one who locked me up. I did it only once. Afterwards we managed to get a good relationship. I even got him writing again, and he was trying to stop drinking. You think that it is because of that that I think that I beat up Willie here?"

"You'll have to ask Willie that."

"He won't tell me. All he says it that I was nuts."

"Tell him that he owes you the truth. That you need to know it. If he's your friend he should tell you. I think you should call him right now." She picked up the phone and began to dial.

"No" Barnabas stopped her "I can't call him at this hour. He's a bundle of nerves because of Louella, and if I call him now, he's going to think that something happened to her. And God knows when, if ever, I will get him to calm down."

Iris raised her eyebrows, but refrained from asking about Louella. She just returned the phone to the cradle and turned to him.

"Maybe I can tell you something. Not much. I had a very limited experience with you in 1967. I remember that I was walking home when I was suddenly seized."

Barnabas shuddered, knowing what she meant.

"I wasn't seriously harmed. Was sick for a couple of days, that's all. But I remember the fear and sense of helplessness."

"I'm sorry."

"I guess that's why I did that to you."

"Did what?"

"Play SM games with you. Remember that you accused me of that?"

He turned his face. "I am sorry I said that."

"You were right. One hundred percent right. I didn't want to admit it to myself but that was what I was doing. I...I enjoyed seeing you uncomfortable. In a way it seemed to make up for those days in 1967 when I was sick in bed, going over my fear and sense of humiliation. Can you understand that?"

"I understand" And Iris had not been the only one. That's why they made passes at him, and why they poked him in the shoulder. "I guess I brought it on myself."

"I didn't mean any real harm by it. It just...made me feel better. And I went too far."

"It was my fault too. Even if you did that, I should have remembered that there is a lot more to you than a penchant for occasional SM games."

"And there is more to you than just your fangs." she kissed him lightly.

"Would you like to start all over again?"

"Yes. You are not the great love of my life, and I am not the great love of your life. We get reasonably well together, and we have some laughs. I am not perfect, and neither are you.."

"No, we are not."

"I will try to keep the SM down. If it gets too much, tell me."

* * *

"...And that's all that happened." Willie finished.

His eyes stung as he saw Barnabas run his fingers over Maggie's music box. Why had he kept the truth form him that long? Was it for Barnabas' own good, as he claimed? Or was that his revenge for the brutality with which Barnabas had treated him in 1967?

"When I beat you" Barnabas's voice was steadier now. "did it hurt much?"

"It stopped hurting a long time ago." Willie put his hand on Barnabas's shoulder.

"You are a good friend" Barnabas covered Willie's hand " much better than I deserve. And Jason is still buried there?"

"Between it being self-defense and your temporary insanity, you could beat the rap."

"Willie...Willie " there was a beginning of a smile in Barnabas' lips now. "I didn't beat you just because I was crazy. In my time there was nothing wrong with beating up servants. My father did it, and I saw it. He did not beat my mother, as he was legally entitled to, and he felt very virtuous because of it... The Collins family made money out of the slave trade...And there were raids on the Indians... it was a rather brutal time...I had much to learn when I came out."

"You managed quite well."

"Because of the songs. I found out that I needed to listen to Simon and Garfunkel songs. I hung around wherever they were played. I guess that's where I learned my political philosophy too" he laughed , and part of it was real amusement. "If I am such an impossible liberal, it is because I love those songs so much."

His fingers ran over the lid of the music box. "I put Maggie through Hell. She must still have the scars. If sending me this makes her feel better in any way, so be it."

He lifted the lid and listened.

"Bridge over Troubled Water" The last song that Simon and Garfunkel recorded together.

* * *

Will Barnabas bring new industry to town? What is Joe Haskell painting under Sam's direction? What will happen to Louella and her new obsession with Beth Chavez? What will be done about David? ...Stay tuned...


End file.
